OK, so I was unable to get my very good friend a birthday present and cannot do something in person because she lives in Canadia, thus, I have dedicated a blog post to her. Happy Birthday Randi. I think you're turning 16- enjoy the most overrated year of your life (at least that's what it was for me, I'm sure yours will be alot better) and your pretty blonde hair.
Since I talk about feelings and emo-ness with Randi a lot, It is only fitting that this blog post do the same. For the past couple of days, I have had the strongest urge to have a huge chic-flickathon. Love Actually, the American Pies (esp #2! yes, it is a chic flick), maybe some Amelie or Accepted, (wow, lots of As there...) all watched cuddled up on the couch with lots of chocolate and a box of tissues. Sadly (or maybe fortuitously?) there is no nearby functioning DVD player so instead I settled for VH1's "40 Most Softsational Soft Rock Songs" (Cuz I can't fight this feeling anymore! Yes I've forgotten what I started fighting for!) which managed to mock all of the emo out of me. You see, society does not look happily on honest, strong emotions. When someone comes on very strong, it's often viewed as creepy, or a load of bull shit to just get the other person in bed. (this is especially true if the person coming on is a guy) From my experience, caution usually pays off, as the emo-ness is usually either the latter, or the result of little other emotional experience. (then again, that also just goes to show you what little experience I've had. Blogging Rule #3- If my advice fucks you over, it's not my fault. You have my condolences.) As time goes on, the more experienced people become, the more they see dating and relationships as more of a game than a deep emotional pursuit. (the epitome of this being Sex And the City) Everyone at least partially wants the honest emo that is so often shunned, but everyone is groomed to be excesssivly cautious and not get hurt. It is here where I am tempted to divide the world into a bipolar spectrum- Relationship people (who are more open and intouch with their inner emo, often searching for just a few deep relationships) and Non-Relationship people (who more prefer a variety of shorter, less meaningful affairs with far less emo). NR leaning people are not necessarily more eexperienced or in denial, they just have other prorities, or know better than to look for a deep relationship at a that point in time. Ok yeah no shit Juicy that's not rocket science, but I'm getting to my point. (and I never really liked physics anyway...) My point is that I always thought I leaned more towards the non-relationship side of the spectrum, and I am sure that after more cyncial life experience that is where I will be (or hopefully at some point in college cuz I really don't want to waste my precious college years in a serious relationship) but the more I think about it, yearn for my fav chic flicks, and compare myself to others, the more I am starting to think I might lean more towards the relationship side of the spectrum after all. That isn't to say that a one night stand is totally off limits (cuz that was pretty satisfying) but I guess if there was more on the plate id take that too.
You may wonder why it took Juicy so long to come out of the closet about such a simple matter, but like I said, society frowns on honest, strong emotions. Not to mention the more desperate for love you are, the far easier it is for people to take advantage of you. (I'm referencing all those horrible match.com adds, BS psychics, and internet predators) Ever since I was little, my mom told me a guy will say anything to get a girl in bed, and sadly enough i've rarely met people that have proven otherwise. If you just wanna screw, tell me and save me the trouble, please. That's probably how I can justify calling a movie like American Pie 2 (best known for Stiffler's gigs and a lesbian sex scene) a chic flick- the guy chooses someone he cares abiout over the girl he just wants to fuck.
Now I feel I've shared quite enough of my inner emo for today, so I will go to the ghettos of Stratford in search of a "real job." Oh, and here's a juicy fact: they've supposedly developed a pill for pregnant women to take to prevent their children from being homosexual. Bull shit. I'd say damn extremists love your kids for who they are, but then again I'd also say abort a handicapped kid, and that opens up a whole new can of worms.
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Monday, June 04, 2007
Blog Post #50 and Happy Graduation Juicy!!!
So it seems we have stumbled across two very important milestones...the fiftieth (so small, yet so large) blog post on Mango Flavored Addiction and the highschool graduation of yours truly. (not to mention the funnest week ever with more milestones, maybe ill tell you about that later, if you're nice to me.)
graduation was fun...I mean really, you get to wear a pretty dress, get told how smart you are, and feel special for a day. After graduation was even more fun, because 2 of your best buds spend the night at your house, then go with you and more of your buds to party it up in VT and Sharon, CT over the course of 2-3 days. (They also take foreshadowing pit stops in Northampton, take advantage of their spanish speaking abilities, wear bags over their head, meet really cool limo drivers, are deprived of donuts, have deep drunken conversations, have lots of sex, pee in random places, watch Star Trek, and name their hypothetical children. As for me, I just took a faceplant into the bushes.) Reunion anyone? you bet!
Once I had slept for 16 hours and somewhat recovered from the aforementioned excursions, I spent a day with my friend exploring the new town I live in and getting my nails done/eating a humongous sandwhich that fed me for 2 days. I also considered trying to make new friends in the ghettos of Stratford, but they would probably shoot me.
After this, despite graduating and all, I once again found myself on school grounds. Except this time I was spending the night, along with the rest of the Chess Club, at OSK's house in celebration of the end of the year for all our underformer friends. (haha you still have to go to boarding school...) This being-on-campus did not disturb me though, because I could walk around campus at 4am and not get in trouble, drive without signing out, etc. etc. We also went quasi-skinny dipping (It was very awesomely old school.), drank energy drinks (what else is new?), played lots of pool, ran around a field screaming, were circled by a minivan (that I tried to jump into) and watched Anne climb on top of a bus.
As you can see, this isn't much of a blog post. It is more like a random list of events that, for the first time in awhile, I would just like to remember. And I think there might be a few more to come too, Which is why I am thinking of starting journaling again. You see, starting the summer before 7th grade up until 9th grade, I was actually a really intensive artistic journaler. (sounds so cool, I know) And I think I might take it up again to document this summer and my college years. The thought also occured to me on the last day of classes, when, despite his class being the bane of my existence, my philosophy teacher gave us some useful life lessons that I plan on sticking too so I can live a more meaningful life. I don't know what this means for Mango, but hopefully I will find some way to balance both, and this will definitley not be the last post.
But wait, did Juicy just say she actually learned something? Yes, despite slacking off more this year than she has in awhile, Juicy actually learned a lot. And seeing as I am now a highschool graduate, I can legitimatley pass on to you Mango Addicts a few of the critical life lessons I have learned this year (despite the fact that I stopped doing the reading in winter.)
1. In the present one must simply accept that not everyone gets what they want or deserve. Life is sometimes merely a series of actions and reactions with no sympathetic governing higher force. Infact, in the short term, Life is often a flaming shit hole. Deal with it. Karma is a long term thing, and something good will happen...eventually.
2. the tiniest things can have the biggest, most entirely disproportional and unjustified consequences.
3. the truth always comes out to somebody.
4. the following are physically impossible. No matter how many energy drinks you have they will not be accomplished, so do not even fool yourself into thinking they will happen:
- completeing the majority of the assigned reading and writing a paper for it in one day
- writing more than one general length paper in one day
- staying up all night and actually spending all night productivley working
- staying up all night and not falling asleep in class the next day without massive amounts of caffeinated gum.
-getting 3 major assignments done in one day, even if it is a free day
5. You are not invincible. You may well have finally screwed yourself over for the last time. Yes, It could happen to you.
6. Never say Never, ever. One night I thought to myself "wow, things could not possibly get any worse, I would almost be amused to see what fate could come up with to make my life even worse!" Guess what, it did. As I was talking to someone on the phone afterwards and explaining to them how my life now surly could not possibly get any worse, I looked out the window and usual damp spring weather had turned into a raging blizzard in about 15 min. I kid you not. Never say never. Ever.
7. If you really want something and beleive in it, fucking go for it. Accepting failure is better than perpetual false hope. And don't cop out half way, try to convince yourself it's not that important, or sit back and calculate and take the safe route. Sometimes the only way to get it is to just jump.
8. You should probly stop once you get into double digits...it's a delayed reaction. From now on, we shall no longer use the "T" word.
9. Hydration is next to Godliness.
10. Never use an Academy of Driving car. ever.
11. Amor Fati dammit.
12. Everyone's a little psycho inside.
graduation was fun...I mean really, you get to wear a pretty dress, get told how smart you are, and feel special for a day. After graduation was even more fun, because 2 of your best buds spend the night at your house, then go with you and more of your buds to party it up in VT and Sharon, CT over the course of 2-3 days. (They also take foreshadowing pit stops in Northampton, take advantage of their spanish speaking abilities, wear bags over their head, meet really cool limo drivers, are deprived of donuts, have deep drunken conversations, have lots of sex, pee in random places, watch Star Trek, and name their hypothetical children. As for me, I just took a faceplant into the bushes.) Reunion anyone? you bet!
Once I had slept for 16 hours and somewhat recovered from the aforementioned excursions, I spent a day with my friend exploring the new town I live in and getting my nails done/eating a humongous sandwhich that fed me for 2 days. I also considered trying to make new friends in the ghettos of Stratford, but they would probably shoot me.
After this, despite graduating and all, I once again found myself on school grounds. Except this time I was spending the night, along with the rest of the Chess Club, at OSK's house in celebration of the end of the year for all our underformer friends. (haha you still have to go to boarding school...) This being-on-campus did not disturb me though, because I could walk around campus at 4am and not get in trouble, drive without signing out, etc. etc. We also went quasi-skinny dipping (It was very awesomely old school.), drank energy drinks (what else is new?), played lots of pool, ran around a field screaming, were circled by a minivan (that I tried to jump into) and watched Anne climb on top of a bus.
As you can see, this isn't much of a blog post. It is more like a random list of events that, for the first time in awhile, I would just like to remember. And I think there might be a few more to come too, Which is why I am thinking of starting journaling again. You see, starting the summer before 7th grade up until 9th grade, I was actually a really intensive artistic journaler. (sounds so cool, I know) And I think I might take it up again to document this summer and my college years. The thought also occured to me on the last day of classes, when, despite his class being the bane of my existence, my philosophy teacher gave us some useful life lessons that I plan on sticking too so I can live a more meaningful life. I don't know what this means for Mango, but hopefully I will find some way to balance both, and this will definitley not be the last post.
But wait, did Juicy just say she actually learned something? Yes, despite slacking off more this year than she has in awhile, Juicy actually learned a lot. And seeing as I am now a highschool graduate, I can legitimatley pass on to you Mango Addicts a few of the critical life lessons I have learned this year (despite the fact that I stopped doing the reading in winter.)
1. In the present one must simply accept that not everyone gets what they want or deserve. Life is sometimes merely a series of actions and reactions with no sympathetic governing higher force. Infact, in the short term, Life is often a flaming shit hole. Deal with it. Karma is a long term thing, and something good will happen...eventually.
2. the tiniest things can have the biggest, most entirely disproportional and unjustified consequences.
3. the truth always comes out to somebody.
4. the following are physically impossible. No matter how many energy drinks you have they will not be accomplished, so do not even fool yourself into thinking they will happen:
- completeing the majority of the assigned reading and writing a paper for it in one day
- writing more than one general length paper in one day
- staying up all night and actually spending all night productivley working
- staying up all night and not falling asleep in class the next day without massive amounts of caffeinated gum.
-getting 3 major assignments done in one day, even if it is a free day
5. You are not invincible. You may well have finally screwed yourself over for the last time. Yes, It could happen to you.
6. Never say Never, ever. One night I thought to myself "wow, things could not possibly get any worse, I would almost be amused to see what fate could come up with to make my life even worse!" Guess what, it did. As I was talking to someone on the phone afterwards and explaining to them how my life now surly could not possibly get any worse, I looked out the window and usual damp spring weather had turned into a raging blizzard in about 15 min. I kid you not. Never say never. Ever.
7. If you really want something and beleive in it, fucking go for it. Accepting failure is better than perpetual false hope. And don't cop out half way, try to convince yourself it's not that important, or sit back and calculate and take the safe route. Sometimes the only way to get it is to just jump.
8. You should probly stop once you get into double digits...it's a delayed reaction. From now on, we shall no longer use the "T" word.
9. Hydration is next to Godliness.
10. Never use an Academy of Driving car. ever.
11. Amor Fati dammit.
12. Everyone's a little psycho inside.
Monday, May 21, 2007
Ramble On...
Well, it's senior spring (I know this because today all I brought to class was a pen) and I am still stuck in rm. 10 because my advisor says she needs to talk to people before she takes me out, even though I only have one week left, no more work to do, and it was my idea to put me in here in the first place, go figure...
Anyway, it's because of this massive chunk of free time in rm 10 that I am sitting down and blogging for you today, even though I don't really have anything specific to blog about (and by specific I actually mean "interesting" and "well-structured") but hopefully that will change by the time you have finished reading this. then again, maybe not.
I couldn't sleep last night, so right now I'm pretty much my usual walking-zombie of a self. Just thought I would throw that in there. But after hours of tossing and turning and thinking about life, I came up with an idea: Next time i keep a diary or journal (I don't know if it would work for a blog cuz i don't always post so frequently) every day i should complete the following sentance honestly on a daily basis: "I wish that _____." You see, it sounds ridiculously PC and lame, but by giving our lives just that much more direction, we can have a slightly better idea of what we want to get out of life and work for it. We can also look back to our previous thoughts and aspirations. I know I sound like a bloody self-help book right now, but cut me some slack here it was 4am...
Before I was unable to sleep, yesterday was interesting because I was stuck in a personal dilemma: graduation dresses. Should I wear the straight cut, but lacy, Lily Pulitzer graduation dress (that looked very classy, and well, like a graduation dress) or the flowy, sparkely one that, though not really what I had in mind for the occassion, looked really cool and hippy-esh? I found myself thinking: should I look like I did during my 6th grade graduation? in a little, classiclally cut talbots piece that did the job yet somehow didn't feel right? Should I wear the dress that looks like a graduation dress? the dress that fits me very well and is slimming, but comes from one of the preppiest companies ever that many others maybe wearing? OR should I wear the dress that originally I did not care for but mom wanted to keep it and the more I tried it on the more I liked it? The dress that was bought, as is much of my other clothing, in the teen section of a department store? The dress that sortof looks like a flower child might wear it? Is it too much for graduation? am I still that much of a nonconformist, and do I want to flaunt that at graduation?
Now that I have managed to take a stupid thing like graduation dresses and turn it into a dilemma of conformity v. nonconformity, you can understand why it took me an entire afternoon to nail down one. They both looked cute. Needless to say now that I reflect on it, I may be a little sweatier on the day thanks to the lack of $200 linen, but I went with the hippy one.
Once my mom left, it was my last sunday on campus before graduation. (6 days bitches!) So I found myself doing what I always do on sunday, except this time it was more fun because I didn't have any work hanging over my head. (Actually I just remembered I do, but oh well, I have another 45 min to kill. ) So I went to the klingon's basement to watch sci fi with him and george, then ate dinner, then chilled with george and tried to watch 2 movies but the fates were clearly against it, so we hung out with mark in the stud until his feed, then we wandered around campus to kill another half hour.
OK so now I am clearly rambling but that is pretty much my sunday in a nutshell. Oh, and if any of my readers would like to supply me with reviews/information regarding Alexia or Trima pills, please do so. I've been doing a lot of online research and the two seem *very* fishily related and I think once were owned by the same company but I can't find anything official...Yeah, if it's not a total scam, I'm gonna try it.
Anyway, it's because of this massive chunk of free time in rm 10 that I am sitting down and blogging for you today, even though I don't really have anything specific to blog about (and by specific I actually mean "interesting" and "well-structured") but hopefully that will change by the time you have finished reading this. then again, maybe not.
I couldn't sleep last night, so right now I'm pretty much my usual walking-zombie of a self. Just thought I would throw that in there. But after hours of tossing and turning and thinking about life, I came up with an idea: Next time i keep a diary or journal (I don't know if it would work for a blog cuz i don't always post so frequently) every day i should complete the following sentance honestly on a daily basis: "I wish that _____." You see, it sounds ridiculously PC and lame, but by giving our lives just that much more direction, we can have a slightly better idea of what we want to get out of life and work for it. We can also look back to our previous thoughts and aspirations. I know I sound like a bloody self-help book right now, but cut me some slack here it was 4am...
Before I was unable to sleep, yesterday was interesting because I was stuck in a personal dilemma: graduation dresses. Should I wear the straight cut, but lacy, Lily Pulitzer graduation dress (that looked very classy, and well, like a graduation dress) or the flowy, sparkely one that, though not really what I had in mind for the occassion, looked really cool and hippy-esh? I found myself thinking: should I look like I did during my 6th grade graduation? in a little, classiclally cut talbots piece that did the job yet somehow didn't feel right? Should I wear the dress that looks like a graduation dress? the dress that fits me very well and is slimming, but comes from one of the preppiest companies ever that many others maybe wearing? OR should I wear the dress that originally I did not care for but mom wanted to keep it and the more I tried it on the more I liked it? The dress that was bought, as is much of my other clothing, in the teen section of a department store? The dress that sortof looks like a flower child might wear it? Is it too much for graduation? am I still that much of a nonconformist, and do I want to flaunt that at graduation?
Now that I have managed to take a stupid thing like graduation dresses and turn it into a dilemma of conformity v. nonconformity, you can understand why it took me an entire afternoon to nail down one. They both looked cute. Needless to say now that I reflect on it, I may be a little sweatier on the day thanks to the lack of $200 linen, but I went with the hippy one.
Once my mom left, it was my last sunday on campus before graduation. (6 days bitches!) So I found myself doing what I always do on sunday, except this time it was more fun because I didn't have any work hanging over my head. (Actually I just remembered I do, but oh well, I have another 45 min to kill. ) So I went to the klingon's basement to watch sci fi with him and george, then ate dinner, then chilled with george and tried to watch 2 movies but the fates were clearly against it, so we hung out with mark in the stud until his feed, then we wandered around campus to kill another half hour.
OK so now I am clearly rambling but that is pretty much my sunday in a nutshell. Oh, and if any of my readers would like to supply me with reviews/information regarding Alexia or Trima pills, please do so. I've been doing a lot of online research and the two seem *very* fishily related and I think once were owned by the same company but I can't find anything official...Yeah, if it's not a total scam, I'm gonna try it.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
The End of Emo (Serious!) and Some Words on Change...
Well I don't feel like finishing my last paper of the year (finally!!!) so instead I am going to update my blog, because it's been awhile since I wrote something that wasn't obnoxiously emo, and I feel the old Addiction could use a little revamp...maybe that will come later as a birthday present or something, but here's a start. Oh, and I'm bringing back candy necklaces...
Speaking of changes, I graduate in ten days. Yes, ten, exactly. The countdown is getting close...I think it just hit me yesterday, when I saw what I will now refer to as 'My Tent' (for those of you who arent in the prep school loop, every year they set up a large white tent on a certain lawn to host the spring formal dance and graduation) or maybe it just hit me today, when i was looking at my free blocks in my agenda trying to waste away class time and then realized that this was my last day of thursday classes. Ever. I would never have my classes in this order ever again. After these last few days: no more block schedules, no more orderly, organized days, no more lunches in Watts with friends, no more the exact same group of friends, no more coats and ties, no more bells, no more dress code, no more cramming in the library, no more wasting time in the computer lab.
And just when I thought I was itching to graduate and get the hell out of this horrible year, I gotta hand it to ya, I'm gonna miss it...
But until then, I can still look forward to the parties and having what will probably be the most kick ass summer ever, not to mention college : ) (even though I also realized today how much of a huge change that is going to be, and it sortof scared the shit out of me...)
More on changes: When I first came here as a not-so-wee sophomore, I remember thinking of the seniors as these big, old, untouchable people. (then again when I first got here almost everyone was untouchable, and sortof all blended to form a large social wall that I would sit in front of and observe with amusement, occassionally attempt to climb, but never get dissapointed too much with if I failed) Then again, I always thought I would feel so much older as a senior in highschool, or at least look a little taller or more savvy/mature/bad ass. (I blame my lack of car keys...I seriously think that does the trick) I remember when i was 13 or 14, 17 seemed so far away, so close to 20 it was like the last threshold of my young life, but now that I'm here I still feel like I have a little ways more to go (phew!) 18's in 6 months, that should be fun. I guess another thing to add into this section would be how much everything's so ridiculously changed since sophomore year- myself, my views, my friends, my life- It seems like such a long journey that I never thought would end. I always knew it would, I just could never really picture it...Shit man, I'm going to college.
I'll break with the cliches to give you a little anecdote: Once I was chilling with my blog buddies in the comp lab, and I said "But just think, for the rest of our lives, when we look back on highschool, this is gonna be it!" And it's true to, no redos, and it can help determine who you are and how you act for the rest of your life...(or can it? I dunno yet but that's what I've heard) Then JV of course made a joke while trying look cool and to do a snapsnap: 'yeah! just this! right here! right now!" while gavrich typed something on his laptop and I continued to procrastinate my comp gov paper. Haha, too true.
We've got ten days guys, for christsakes, make it something you're proud of. Penis candy anyone?
Speaking of changes, I graduate in ten days. Yes, ten, exactly. The countdown is getting close...I think it just hit me yesterday, when I saw what I will now refer to as 'My Tent' (for those of you who arent in the prep school loop, every year they set up a large white tent on a certain lawn to host the spring formal dance and graduation) or maybe it just hit me today, when i was looking at my free blocks in my agenda trying to waste away class time and then realized that this was my last day of thursday classes. Ever. I would never have my classes in this order ever again. After these last few days: no more block schedules, no more orderly, organized days, no more lunches in Watts with friends, no more the exact same group of friends, no more coats and ties, no more bells, no more dress code, no more cramming in the library, no more wasting time in the computer lab.
And just when I thought I was itching to graduate and get the hell out of this horrible year, I gotta hand it to ya, I'm gonna miss it...
But until then, I can still look forward to the parties and having what will probably be the most kick ass summer ever, not to mention college : ) (even though I also realized today how much of a huge change that is going to be, and it sortof scared the shit out of me...)
More on changes: When I first came here as a not-so-wee sophomore, I remember thinking of the seniors as these big, old, untouchable people. (then again when I first got here almost everyone was untouchable, and sortof all blended to form a large social wall that I would sit in front of and observe with amusement, occassionally attempt to climb, but never get dissapointed too much with if I failed) Then again, I always thought I would feel so much older as a senior in highschool, or at least look a little taller or more savvy/mature/bad ass. (I blame my lack of car keys...I seriously think that does the trick) I remember when i was 13 or 14, 17 seemed so far away, so close to 20 it was like the last threshold of my young life, but now that I'm here I still feel like I have a little ways more to go (phew!) 18's in 6 months, that should be fun. I guess another thing to add into this section would be how much everything's so ridiculously changed since sophomore year- myself, my views, my friends, my life- It seems like such a long journey that I never thought would end. I always knew it would, I just could never really picture it...Shit man, I'm going to college.
I'll break with the cliches to give you a little anecdote: Once I was chilling with my blog buddies in the comp lab, and I said "But just think, for the rest of our lives, when we look back on highschool, this is gonna be it!" And it's true to, no redos, and it can help determine who you are and how you act for the rest of your life...(or can it? I dunno yet but that's what I've heard) Then JV of course made a joke while trying look cool and to do a snapsnap: 'yeah! just this! right here! right now!" while gavrich typed something on his laptop and I continued to procrastinate my comp gov paper. Haha, too true.
We've got ten days guys, for christsakes, make it something you're proud of. Penis candy anyone?
Sunday, May 13, 2007
You'll say that we have nothing in commmon...
...no common ground to stomp on, and we're falling apart...Then I said what about breakfast at tiffany's? She said I think I remember the film. Oh yes, I recall: I think we both kinda liked it, and I said well thats the one thing we got!
yeah....anyway, I would just like to preface this blog by informing all my readers of the second major blogging rule (the first being that anything read here cannot be used against myself or anyone I write about)
Rule #2- the address of a blog or any portion of its contents is never to be given to a prospective significant other/significant other/ anyone else who may in any way endanger the level of posting honesty, bluntness, and/or integrity. ( i mean seriously... look what happenned to vertical's...)
by having visited this page, you are now forced to adhere to that statement by consequence of paperclip castration or another equivalent horror. (yeah...I said it...)
Moving on....
So It was almost a double hitter saturday, which is a big deal in Juicy's loser life because she's been on a losing streak since middle school. The second hit has probably been rendered a DSQ, but it's still nice to know I can meet people without going out of my way to flirt my balls off. (haha that statement's funny cuz I'm talking about flirting but I don't have balls, well, not physically...) Anyway, with all the good fortune that has come to me in the past 24 hours, I have also realized a horrible curse:
Guys that have CLEARLY articulated interest: 4
Percent of which I was interested in: 0
Percent of which were on the "wow, I would have to be pretty desperate to go there" list: 100
yeah...I'll get off my bitchy high horse now by saying that 4 was somewhat endearing in his slowness...but then again, that sounds bitchy according to some... so I guess I'm just an ungrateful bitch. (another fabulous reason for rule #2)
Are my standards too high? I doubt it....(really) And ever since last years' psychoness the usual list of attractive qualities got near annihilated so that opened up another 40 percent of the population... I know a lot of you think that I'm just itching to get some but I just want to take a second to clarify that I'm actually not that desperate (except for maybe that one time...) and no, it's not all physical. (which is a nuisance, maybe I should just get balls...psh...you guys have it way too easy...)
Yeah so I'm gonna stop now I just wanted to point that out, plus I figured my lucky day deserved a post and some deep reflection...
yeah....anyway, I would just like to preface this blog by informing all my readers of the second major blogging rule (the first being that anything read here cannot be used against myself or anyone I write about)
Rule #2- the address of a blog or any portion of its contents is never to be given to a prospective significant other/significant other/ anyone else who may in any way endanger the level of posting honesty, bluntness, and/or integrity. ( i mean seriously... look what happenned to vertical's...)
by having visited this page, you are now forced to adhere to that statement by consequence of paperclip castration or another equivalent horror. (yeah...I said it...)
Moving on....
So It was almost a double hitter saturday, which is a big deal in Juicy's loser life because she's been on a losing streak since middle school. The second hit has probably been rendered a DSQ, but it's still nice to know I can meet people without going out of my way to flirt my balls off. (haha that statement's funny cuz I'm talking about flirting but I don't have balls, well, not physically...) Anyway, with all the good fortune that has come to me in the past 24 hours, I have also realized a horrible curse:
Guys that have CLEARLY articulated interest: 4
Percent of which I was interested in: 0
Percent of which were on the "wow, I would have to be pretty desperate to go there" list: 100
yeah...I'll get off my bitchy high horse now by saying that 4 was somewhat endearing in his slowness...but then again, that sounds bitchy according to some... so I guess I'm just an ungrateful bitch. (another fabulous reason for rule #2)
Are my standards too high? I doubt it....(really) And ever since last years' psychoness the usual list of attractive qualities got near annihilated so that opened up another 40 percent of the population... I know a lot of you think that I'm just itching to get some but I just want to take a second to clarify that I'm actually not that desperate (except for maybe that one time...) and no, it's not all physical. (which is a nuisance, maybe I should just get balls...psh...you guys have it way too easy...)
Yeah so I'm gonna stop now I just wanted to point that out, plus I figured my lucky day deserved a post and some deep reflection...
Friday, May 04, 2007
23 Days and Counting...
...way...too...slowly...I just want to graduate so I can stop being paranoid and be rid of this entire fucking year. I'm sick of procrastinating and not doing work cuz of all these fucking meaningless distractions. I'm sick of kicking myself for not working because i'm afraid i'll lose my spot in college and don't want to go to summer school. I'm sick of being "sick" to compensate for being a fuck up. I'm sick of feeling like it's sophomore year again, emo shit included. I'm sick of getting reports. I'm sick of freaking out every time I get a report because im afraid i'll get the boot. I'm sick of more and more bad things just piling up on me that are entirely my own fucky fault. I'm sick of not learning from my own mistakes for the billionth time. I'm sick of all these fucking couples. I'm sick of nothing good ever happenning except for getting my fav chocolate for doing well in Comp Gov. (then again today I bombed a test so oh well. If you were wondering why, it's cuz I'm a fuck up.)
I know it's idealistic to think that in college i'll be able to magically go back to perky over achieverness, or even if that's who I am anymore, or that i'll stop procrastinating, or actually get up on time, but there's still hope. I've already accepted the fact that i'm comprised of at least %50 pure fuck up (on a good day), at least they wont rub it in my face with reports 24/7, or chapel talks about fellow fuck ups of ages past. If you know me then you heard the chapel talk today, all about warnings v. actual consequences. story of my life. It was funny too, I probably would have enjoyed it more if i weren't cramming for a test that i had all the time in the world to study for, but didn't because, well, I'm a fuck up. Seriously, even my friends are starting to get sick of me bitching about it.
I don't have too much else to say today, unless actually I felt like it, but no truly emo statement is ever complete without...
Don't Let Me Get Me
Pink
Never win first place, I dont support the team
I cant take direction, and my socks are never
Clean
Teachers dated me, my parents hated me
I was always in a fight cuz I cant do nothin
Right
Everyday I fight a war against the mirror
I cant take the person starin back at me
I'm a hazard to myself
Dont let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Dont wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
I wanna be somebody else, yeah
La told me, youll be a pop star,
All you have to change is everything you are.
Tired of being compared to damn britney spears
Shes so pretty, that just aint me
Doctor, doctor wont you please prescribe me
Somethin
A day in the life of someone else?
Cuz Im a hazard to myself
Dont let me get me
Im my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Dont wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
Dont let me get me
Im my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Dont wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
Doctor, doctor wont you please prescribe me
Somethin
A day in the life of someone else?
Dont let me get me
Dont let me get me
Im my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Dont wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
I know it's idealistic to think that in college i'll be able to magically go back to perky over achieverness, or even if that's who I am anymore, or that i'll stop procrastinating, or actually get up on time, but there's still hope. I've already accepted the fact that i'm comprised of at least %50 pure fuck up (on a good day), at least they wont rub it in my face with reports 24/7, or chapel talks about fellow fuck ups of ages past. If you know me then you heard the chapel talk today, all about warnings v. actual consequences. story of my life. It was funny too, I probably would have enjoyed it more if i weren't cramming for a test that i had all the time in the world to study for, but didn't because, well, I'm a fuck up. Seriously, even my friends are starting to get sick of me bitching about it.
I don't have too much else to say today, unless actually I felt like it, but no truly emo statement is ever complete without...
Don't Let Me Get Me
Pink
Never win first place, I dont support the team
I cant take direction, and my socks are never
Clean
Teachers dated me, my parents hated me
I was always in a fight cuz I cant do nothin
Right
Everyday I fight a war against the mirror
I cant take the person starin back at me
I'm a hazard to myself
Dont let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Dont wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
I wanna be somebody else, yeah
La told me, youll be a pop star,
All you have to change is everything you are.
Tired of being compared to damn britney spears
Shes so pretty, that just aint me
Doctor, doctor wont you please prescribe me
Somethin
A day in the life of someone else?
Cuz Im a hazard to myself
Dont let me get me
Im my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Dont wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
Dont let me get me
Im my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Dont wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
Doctor, doctor wont you please prescribe me
Somethin
A day in the life of someone else?
Dont let me get me
Dont let me get me
Im my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Dont wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
Sunday, April 29, 2007
The Spoon Doesn't Lie...
I've spent the past two years (well, ok, more like one-and-a-half) working my butt off to ensure I have every option and advantage possible when it comes to making this decision, and I finally narrowed it down to two very different (but both freakishly Nexusy) choices. The mild panic attack I just had over making such a big decision in the first place didn't help, nor has my reoccurring volition to base it solely on maximizing radical change in my life. Hell, once I thought I made the decision, and then turned against it solely because everything just seemed to be moving too well in that direction. To be honest, I'm not sure if I will love where I am going, in fact, I figure there is a chance I will leave. But there is also a chance that it will be one of the best times of my life, and the more I think and ask about it, the more encouragement I get, even from many fortuitously placed strangers. In the long run I really feel it's for the best, so ladies and gentlemen, without further ado...The spoon doesn't lie. See you in Massachusetts.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Ski More College
...yeah... that was on a bumper sticker on a car with roof racks...thought it was clever...Anyway, so the quest for JuicyU continues and I think we can safely cross Skidmore off the list...It was nice (in a summer camp meets eco-friendly big prep school in the very pretty middle of nowhere kind of way) and the people were OK (in a preppy meets hippy sorta way) But I don't know if i could see myself there for a solid 4 years without losing my mind, or at least half of my brain cells because, um...party school much? I was walking around the senior housing and every appartment had a recycling bin filled over the top with beer crates, and I looked inside one of them and it was just all bottles all along the counter. This was thursday afternoon. The freshman dorm also breaks several doors/windows a semester.
While the college itself wasn't so amazing, (PS who was smart enough to put accepted candidates day on 4/20?) the 2.5 hour ride up there actually was. My dad got a guy that works for him (early 20s?) to drive me up, and even though we had never met before we spent the entire time bonding and talking about feelings. (yay!) It was highly enjoyable, and I learned some interesting things:
1. I am a severely harsh realist
2. His ex girlfriend is a bitch
3. If you think someone is lying, they probably are
4. If you do not know if a guy or a girl is lying, trust the guy
5. His ex girlfriend is a bitch
6. Guys hurt more after a break up...they may rarely get attached, but when they do, they really do...
7. Dating two guys simontaneously and just not telling one about the other is apparently a really bitchy thing to do (who knew?)
8. His ex girlfriend is a BITTCHHH!!!
9. Number 4 is void if the guy is a player
10. You may think that your life is at a horrible point, but it really could be worse...You have a lot to be thankful for.
11. When looking at a prospective mate, you can learn a lot about them from their family
12. being the youngest and only guy with 9 older sisters is...interesting
13. When you realize that your serious girlfriend of 3 yearswhom you almost married has been dating another guy for 4 months, and the other guy finds out that she's been tagging you along for 3 years, plotting together on an elaborate confrontation inwhich to humiliate the bitch is the thing to do!
Yeah, learned a little more from that than I probly would have at the anatomy class i slept through...
While the college itself wasn't so amazing, (PS who was smart enough to put accepted candidates day on 4/20?) the 2.5 hour ride up there actually was. My dad got a guy that works for him (early 20s?) to drive me up, and even though we had never met before we spent the entire time bonding and talking about feelings. (yay!) It was highly enjoyable, and I learned some interesting things:
1. I am a severely harsh realist
2. His ex girlfriend is a bitch
3. If you think someone is lying, they probably are
4. If you do not know if a guy or a girl is lying, trust the guy
5. His ex girlfriend is a bitch
6. Guys hurt more after a break up...they may rarely get attached, but when they do, they really do...
7. Dating two guys simontaneously and just not telling one about the other is apparently a really bitchy thing to do (who knew?)
8. His ex girlfriend is a BITTCHHH!!!
9. Number 4 is void if the guy is a player
10. You may think that your life is at a horrible point, but it really could be worse...You have a lot to be thankful for.
11. When looking at a prospective mate, you can learn a lot about them from their family
12. being the youngest and only guy with 9 older sisters is...interesting
13. When you realize that your serious girlfriend of 3 yearswhom you almost married has been dating another guy for 4 months, and the other guy finds out that she's been tagging you along for 3 years, plotting together on an elaborate confrontation inwhich to humiliate the bitch is the thing to do!
Yeah, learned a little more from that than I probly would have at the anatomy class i slept through...
Monday, April 16, 2007
Senior Spring....Or Not....
Dad: I don't wanna hear any more of this senioritis bullshit...if you don't try your best to get back on superus you're going to summer school.
( Juicy's thinking: Isn't this how bad movies are started? oh god...)
Juicy: dad...it's senior spring...these grades don't matter.
Dad: yes, they do! they will be on your record for the rest of your life. Trust me, I am an employer and if I'm going to spend $150,000 on someone I want to know they always did their best.
Juicy: But dad, do you have any idea how hard i worked junior year? i was like a hypochondriac caffeine addict. it was not healthy!!!
Dad: well, go back to the caffeine then! i've been doing the caffeine for 50 years and look where I got
Juicy: your Doctor says your at high risk of a heart attack...
Dad: well at least I know I gave it my all
Juicy: true...
What Juicy wanted to say but kindly didnt to avoid her father's midlife crisis:
Gave it your all for what, huh? for a huge, empty house and a boat that's never big enough? You're never happy. to pay for my education so I could grow up to be just like you? for a highschool average you still remember 30 years later? everytime I talk to you you regret not being a Bill Gates so some part of you clearly feels like you failed something. All you care about is "success" that you measure in social status. Whatever happenned to just enjoying your life? What if I don't mind just being average? I don't need all that. You've been alive for fifty years, how could you not have seen that you can't always give it your best 24/7? That hard work doesn't always pay off? C'mon I know you know that. Yeah maybe I am giving up, and maybe you're not proud of me. But sorry for not jumping back in the ring to fight the good fight when I don't have anything left to fight for.
What Juicy Then Said: Dad...when was the last time you stopped perpetually thinking about the next step and just enjoyed the present?
Dad: You can never stop thinking about the next step; it'll be there before you know it.
That, ladies and gentlemen, is the end of childhood.
( Juicy's thinking: Isn't this how bad movies are started? oh god...)
Juicy: dad...it's senior spring...these grades don't matter.
Dad: yes, they do! they will be on your record for the rest of your life. Trust me, I am an employer and if I'm going to spend $150,000 on someone I want to know they always did their best.
Juicy: But dad, do you have any idea how hard i worked junior year? i was like a hypochondriac caffeine addict. it was not healthy!!!
Dad: well, go back to the caffeine then! i've been doing the caffeine for 50 years and look where I got
Juicy: your Doctor says your at high risk of a heart attack...
Dad: well at least I know I gave it my all
Juicy: true...
What Juicy wanted to say but kindly didnt to avoid her father's midlife crisis:
Gave it your all for what, huh? for a huge, empty house and a boat that's never big enough? You're never happy. to pay for my education so I could grow up to be just like you? for a highschool average you still remember 30 years later? everytime I talk to you you regret not being a Bill Gates so some part of you clearly feels like you failed something. All you care about is "success" that you measure in social status. Whatever happenned to just enjoying your life? What if I don't mind just being average? I don't need all that. You've been alive for fifty years, how could you not have seen that you can't always give it your best 24/7? That hard work doesn't always pay off? C'mon I know you know that. Yeah maybe I am giving up, and maybe you're not proud of me. But sorry for not jumping back in the ring to fight the good fight when I don't have anything left to fight for.
What Juicy Then Said: Dad...when was the last time you stopped perpetually thinking about the next step and just enjoyed the present?
Dad: You can never stop thinking about the next step; it'll be there before you know it.
That, ladies and gentlemen, is the end of childhood.
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Breast Fest
hah...hah...rape. Ok, actually no. So i was only at Smith for 24 hours, but apparently that was long enough for me to absorb the fem nazi PC vibe (and get antsy as hell, and accidentally check out a transexual, and meet lots of lesbians) Anyway, there was an exhibit on the in the quad. Every rape victim or friend/family member of a rape victim decorated a t shirt and hung it up. There were over 200 shirts (which is pretty disturbing within itself) and here were a few of the most shocking writings:
"I'm 20 years old and still waiting for my first kiss because of you"
"I came to you for help after I had just been raped. I was still shaking. You raped me again"
"big brother, how does it feel to have your 3 year old sister suck your 18 year old cock?"
"daddy, how could you do that to me?" (like 1/3 of them were peoples dads)
"yeah, but you didn't get raped like i got raped, a random guy on the street with a knife, you knew him, it doesn't count"
yeah...rape...not so funny. But before I get too serious, let's give you mango addicts something else to (consentually) suck on...
ok yeah couldn't think of anything, we'll just have to stick with rape for now...later!
"I'm 20 years old and still waiting for my first kiss because of you"
"I came to you for help after I had just been raped. I was still shaking. You raped me again"
"big brother, how does it feel to have your 3 year old sister suck your 18 year old cock?"
"daddy, how could you do that to me?" (like 1/3 of them were peoples dads)
"yeah, but you didn't get raped like i got raped, a random guy on the street with a knife, you knew him, it doesn't count"
yeah...rape...not so funny. But before I get too serious, let's give you mango addicts something else to (consentually) suck on...
ok yeah couldn't think of anything, we'll just have to stick with rape for now...later!
Friday, April 06, 2007
I'm Sorry I Byrned My Toast
So pretty much the stupidest little thing can lead to the worst most disproportionate consequences, and I am clearly not to be trusted when it comes to self-restraint. My mom, being the eternal optimist that she is, said that things always work out for the best, and sometimes in life the worst things can lead to the very best things. I'm not really sure of that myself, or rather, if it's always true, but i really hope it is. And when it comes to people who arguably risked their ass to save mine, I hope it comes true pretty damn quickly.
Shout Outs. BB.
Shout Outs. BB.
Saturday, March 24, 2007
Damn That Toast
Seriously...yeah that's pretty much it seeing as i've already bitched about my life to the max and can't think of anything else to say right now. It's nice outside today. Hopefully it wont snow tomorrow. Also hopefully, I will have a good week next week, which means that not only will the weather be nice, but i will not want to kill myself. Why you ask? beacuse of the toast.
You see, bread is very good, but when you want to make the bread better, you toast it and add butter. The only problem with this is the more you toast the bread, the higher the risk you run of ruining your scrumptious snack all together. while a nice golden brown is appreciated and considered worthy in life in lieu of the pallid, whiteness of bread, the toast can quickly devovlve from a beautiful brown to an [i have a bad vocaublary so just insert a word that means "disgusting and really really bad"] black. it's hard to know when to stop toasting your toast, and only years of life experience can tell you just what that perfect time is. Most people however, can get a good idea of how much is too much before they're toast has actually turned to nasty black ash. I however, have never been a good or cautious toaster. With every added minute on the dial, i was intrigued by the increasing amount of warmth rising from the mouth of the machine, and often questioned just how warm it really was...it was only after i looked down and saw the dark abyss where my healthy golden toast used to be that i turned off the toaster, and realized what i had done to my once tasty golden toast. I do not like black toast. I am not think i am a black toast type of person. I dont deliberatley burn my toast, i am just attempting to make it more delicious, really. I cannot undo the toasting i have done, and it will be a long time before i can get a new white piece of bread out all together. I can only hope that I have not burned my toast too much, and that if i add enough butter i'll still be able to palatte it without grimacing as i am forced to swallow it. or maybe if Im really lucky, my toast will be scrutinized further, and i will find that if you scrape the little bits of ash off the surface, it was not too black at all, and an even nicer shade of golden brown.
Wish me luck, and a tasty piece of toast.
You see, bread is very good, but when you want to make the bread better, you toast it and add butter. The only problem with this is the more you toast the bread, the higher the risk you run of ruining your scrumptious snack all together. while a nice golden brown is appreciated and considered worthy in life in lieu of the pallid, whiteness of bread, the toast can quickly devovlve from a beautiful brown to an [i have a bad vocaublary so just insert a word that means "disgusting and really really bad"] black. it's hard to know when to stop toasting your toast, and only years of life experience can tell you just what that perfect time is. Most people however, can get a good idea of how much is too much before they're toast has actually turned to nasty black ash. I however, have never been a good or cautious toaster. With every added minute on the dial, i was intrigued by the increasing amount of warmth rising from the mouth of the machine, and often questioned just how warm it really was...it was only after i looked down and saw the dark abyss where my healthy golden toast used to be that i turned off the toaster, and realized what i had done to my once tasty golden toast. I do not like black toast. I am not think i am a black toast type of person. I dont deliberatley burn my toast, i am just attempting to make it more delicious, really. I cannot undo the toasting i have done, and it will be a long time before i can get a new white piece of bread out all together. I can only hope that I have not burned my toast too much, and that if i add enough butter i'll still be able to palatte it without grimacing as i am forced to swallow it. or maybe if Im really lucky, my toast will be scrutinized further, and i will find that if you scrape the little bits of ash off the surface, it was not too black at all, and an even nicer shade of golden brown.
Wish me luck, and a tasty piece of toast.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Juicy's List of Fabulous Fuck Ups
I would just like to take this time to announce that I have fucked myself over yet again, and my life continues to hit newfound alltime lows that were not considered possible up until this point. Here's why. But Before I go onto bitch about my masochisticly cursed existence i would like to shout out all my friends, old and new, because theyre pretty much the only valuable things I have left after half a term, and maybe even a whole year if i think about it too much, of dissapointing myself.
1. as for the first most promintent problem on my mind, i may be pretty dumb sometimes (as i was at this particular time, VERY dumb and just getting dumber) but im not dumb enough to post anything about it on the internet. lets just say we'll see where it goes, and pray to God above (if he exists, or perhaps just Fate if it has any plans for me after all) I stil have a shot at my top choice college and a solid year and a half of working myself into a stupor was not literally flushed away.
2. On the topic of making poor decisions, i have recently realized i am an absolute failure at time management. I also re-realized (this seems to happen alot, so we can add an inablity to learn from the first fuck up to my list of fuck ups) that i cannot live on no sleep and gross amounts of taurine and caffeine, nor can i really buckle down and work in my friends rooms, nor can i socialize until 2 and then start productive work at 4 and continue it until 6, nor can i set my alarm for 5:30 and actually expect myself to get up, nor can i leave off three major assignments to one weekend. (which at my school really means "a day and a half of free time," its very misleading...) Up until now i feel i have been cut a ridiculous amount of slack for my inability to "actually hand anything in on time" (<--- words that will start an epiphany, I swear) but im sick of needing it. really. im sortof disgusted with myself.
3. for the reason detailed in number two, i skipped several classes to catch up and did not get my grades back up to where i want, and i think one of my teachers hates me...(at least one anyway) So not only will i have to deal with my dad yelling at me for poor grades and number 1 simontaneously (ouch), i also get to explain to my advisor what the fuck was going on that last week of school, in addition to number 1. because of said falling grades, again, about a year and a half of work has now been defenstrated.
4. this isnt really a fuck up, but i would just like to take this time to yell at blogger for making me upgrade and confusing me with this new google account thing. thanks blogger, thanks alot for making my life even more annoying. youre supposed to be comforting me here.
6. i failed my drivers test. i blame the car completely, but this still counts as a fuck up...
7. end of this hockey season....awesome start, then I don't know what happenned...this was probably concurrent with when i stopped sleeping
8. i'm 17 and still alone. i dont even want to think about how many fuck ups that entails.
by now youre probably thinking "don't worry juicy, theres more to life than grades, achieving personal goals, freedom, sports, relationships, and college admission" and this is very true, but there may aswell not be because it just gives me something else to fuck up eventually. woohoo!
1. as for the first most promintent problem on my mind, i may be pretty dumb sometimes (as i was at this particular time, VERY dumb and just getting dumber) but im not dumb enough to post anything about it on the internet. lets just say we'll see where it goes, and pray to God above (if he exists, or perhaps just Fate if it has any plans for me after all) I stil have a shot at my top choice college and a solid year and a half of working myself into a stupor was not literally flushed away.
2. On the topic of making poor decisions, i have recently realized i am an absolute failure at time management. I also re-realized (this seems to happen alot, so we can add an inablity to learn from the first fuck up to my list of fuck ups) that i cannot live on no sleep and gross amounts of taurine and caffeine, nor can i really buckle down and work in my friends rooms, nor can i socialize until 2 and then start productive work at 4 and continue it until 6, nor can i set my alarm for 5:30 and actually expect myself to get up, nor can i leave off three major assignments to one weekend. (which at my school really means "a day and a half of free time," its very misleading...) Up until now i feel i have been cut a ridiculous amount of slack for my inability to "actually hand anything in on time" (<--- words that will start an epiphany, I swear) but im sick of needing it. really. im sortof disgusted with myself.
3. for the reason detailed in number two, i skipped several classes to catch up and did not get my grades back up to where i want, and i think one of my teachers hates me...(at least one anyway) So not only will i have to deal with my dad yelling at me for poor grades and number 1 simontaneously (ouch), i also get to explain to my advisor what the fuck was going on that last week of school, in addition to number 1. because of said falling grades, again, about a year and a half of work has now been defenstrated.
4. this isnt really a fuck up, but i would just like to take this time to yell at blogger for making me upgrade and confusing me with this new google account thing. thanks blogger, thanks alot for making my life even more annoying. youre supposed to be comforting me here.
6. i failed my drivers test. i blame the car completely, but this still counts as a fuck up...
7. end of this hockey season....awesome start, then I don't know what happenned...this was probably concurrent with when i stopped sleeping
8. i'm 17 and still alone. i dont even want to think about how many fuck ups that entails.
by now youre probably thinking "don't worry juicy, theres more to life than grades, achieving personal goals, freedom, sports, relationships, and college admission" and this is very true, but there may aswell not be because it just gives me something else to fuck up eventually. woohoo!
Saturday, March 03, 2007
Dear Life, A few questions...
1. What the fuck? It seems everytime I think something is in my past it creeps up on me when i least expect it and most need it. Is there such a thing as destiny and fate, or is this just the way things work out? (though I suppose if im a N.o.F I cant really question fate's existence...my bad...) And if everything from your past does come back to you eventually and is in that way 'fated' to happen, then doesn't that almost make fate less of a big deal if it applies to everything, and not just a few special instances? or,
2. Is just my life this fucked up? seriously...all this shit happenns that always seems so interconnected with everything else and freakishly ironic. Am I just a hallucinating psycho? I mean, we know I'm a psycho at least, Jesus Christ never knew how much of a psycho I was, but why do these things keep happenning to me? and why do they always have to be such a big deal? on the opposite end of the spectrum, If i stop reading my life like a book i might be able to be a little more objective, maybe still a psycho but at least not a psycho with some twisted perception of reality. Then again I'm starting to learn we're all a little psycho.
3. When Dammit? OK, I get the whole 'things happen for a reason and you can always learn stuff' concept, and I've learned a shit load, but what exaclty am I supposed to do with loads and loads of knowledge about how Im a PSYCHO???
ok yeah, 2 40 AM, done WAYYY too much thinking for one day and not enough sleeping for one week, def time to call it a night...dont ask me to explain this....
2. Is just my life this fucked up? seriously...all this shit happenns that always seems so interconnected with everything else and freakishly ironic. Am I just a hallucinating psycho? I mean, we know I'm a psycho at least, Jesus Christ never knew how much of a psycho I was, but why do these things keep happenning to me? and why do they always have to be such a big deal? on the opposite end of the spectrum, If i stop reading my life like a book i might be able to be a little more objective, maybe still a psycho but at least not a psycho with some twisted perception of reality. Then again I'm starting to learn we're all a little psycho.
3. When Dammit? OK, I get the whole 'things happen for a reason and you can always learn stuff' concept, and I've learned a shit load, but what exaclty am I supposed to do with loads and loads of knowledge about how Im a PSYCHO???
ok yeah, 2 40 AM, done WAYYY too much thinking for one day and not enough sleeping for one week, def time to call it a night...dont ask me to explain this....
Monday, February 12, 2007
You Knew It Was Coming...
Well I don't feel like doing my CompGov reading just yet, (if I ever do) so I'm going to take a second to rant about the upcoming "holiday" AKA a catholic saint's feast blown entirely out of proportion because we are a society of dreamy-eyed pussies who gobble up romantic comedies like no other (myself not entirely excluded- still haven't decided which one I'll be bawling my eyes out to come wednesday).
Honestly, I can never decide whether I like Valentine's day or not. On one hand, I get to wear my favorite colors (even if i look like a total tool because I dont actually have a valentine) and eat a lot of chocolate and feel loved by all my friends that send me valentines. (key word in that sentance being 'friends') On the other hand, it disturbs me how Hallmark has taken the most complex and f-ing fickle human emotion (cuz thats really all romantic love is and all that Valentine's day intends to celebrate), something that people have spent thousands of years living and trying to figure out, something that people have even died for, and reduced it to a tacky red heart with a doilie behind it. Seriously. And as if human relationships were that simple. It makes sense to celebrate romantic love and all, but do we have to be so goddam tacky about it? When I think of Valentines day I think of cheap serrated to/from cards (the kind they gave out in grade school and that I only got because you had to be nice and give them to everyone) and tacky one-liners like "will you be my valentine?" Yuck. who wants to be a valentine? It's phrases like that that almost make me glad i'm alone. And even if someone were to ask me out, i'd almost be embarassed to say he did it on Valentine's day just because it's so cliche and superficial sounding.
Let's also not forget that Valentine's day inevitibly makes at LEAST fifty percent of the population miserable. If you are alone, it gets rubbed in even further. If you are alone but someone asks you out, the relationship is in all liklihood doomed because the guy/girl had to wait for some stupid holiday to do anything about it, not to mention probably reduced themself to generic gift giving in lieu of anything really meaningful or thoughtful. (flowers and chocolate: sweet motion, yes, sometimes tasty, but that's pretty much it.) Now let's look at the people who are actually in relationships: half of them will relish the opportunity to show how much they love each other, while the other half will feel awkward because they have no idea what to do, or because one person got really into it and the other didn't. (so now at least 12.5 percent of the population feel like horrible people, and the other 12.5 percent feel like fools. Awesome!)
Now that I've vented my excessive bitterness, I can go on to appreciate what little joy I get from the holiday, i.e. free candy, nice colors, and presents from my friends. (cuz I really do appreciate those, seeing as i'm careful to never actually expect anything to begin with, for those of you that missed my lovely "emo blog" which i would actually link you to but that takes way too much effort) Plus there's always the joy of living vicariously through others and hearing about all the cute shit that happenned to them. As for me, I took a bite of my first piece of Valentine's Day chocolate the other day and I cut my gum...I think we can take that as an omen...
Honestly, I can never decide whether I like Valentine's day or not. On one hand, I get to wear my favorite colors (even if i look like a total tool because I dont actually have a valentine) and eat a lot of chocolate and feel loved by all my friends that send me valentines. (key word in that sentance being 'friends') On the other hand, it disturbs me how Hallmark has taken the most complex and f-ing fickle human emotion (cuz thats really all romantic love is and all that Valentine's day intends to celebrate), something that people have spent thousands of years living and trying to figure out, something that people have even died for, and reduced it to a tacky red heart with a doilie behind it. Seriously. And as if human relationships were that simple. It makes sense to celebrate romantic love and all, but do we have to be so goddam tacky about it? When I think of Valentines day I think of cheap serrated to/from cards (the kind they gave out in grade school and that I only got because you had to be nice and give them to everyone) and tacky one-liners like "will you be my valentine?" Yuck. who wants to be a valentine? It's phrases like that that almost make me glad i'm alone. And even if someone were to ask me out, i'd almost be embarassed to say he did it on Valentine's day just because it's so cliche and superficial sounding.
Let's also not forget that Valentine's day inevitibly makes at LEAST fifty percent of the population miserable. If you are alone, it gets rubbed in even further. If you are alone but someone asks you out, the relationship is in all liklihood doomed because the guy/girl had to wait for some stupid holiday to do anything about it, not to mention probably reduced themself to generic gift giving in lieu of anything really meaningful or thoughtful. (flowers and chocolate: sweet motion, yes, sometimes tasty, but that's pretty much it.) Now let's look at the people who are actually in relationships: half of them will relish the opportunity to show how much they love each other, while the other half will feel awkward because they have no idea what to do, or because one person got really into it and the other didn't. (so now at least 12.5 percent of the population feel like horrible people, and the other 12.5 percent feel like fools. Awesome!)
Now that I've vented my excessive bitterness, I can go on to appreciate what little joy I get from the holiday, i.e. free candy, nice colors, and presents from my friends. (cuz I really do appreciate those, seeing as i'm careful to never actually expect anything to begin with, for those of you that missed my lovely "emo blog" which i would actually link you to but that takes way too much effort) Plus there's always the joy of living vicariously through others and hearing about all the cute shit that happenned to them. As for me, I took a bite of my first piece of Valentine's Day chocolate the other day and I cut my gum...I think we can take that as an omen...
Friday, February 02, 2007
24 HOURS BITCHES!!!!!
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I, Juicy, and Polly, My Indian Sex Kitty (well technically just me but whatever) has broken 24 hours of consecutive conciousness for the first time EVERRR!! How did she do it you ask? Well it all started with these Blue Demon Full Throttles, chosen partially because they were tequila flavored (I think) which are pretty much the sickest things ever (yes, better than Amp)because they taste amazing (good amazing, not like nasty oversweet energy drink so just bear it amazing)and will pretty much have you walking around your neighborhood yelling random things and running around in the snow (!) at six o clock in the morning. Well, at least it will give you the energy to....the psycho bit is probably just me. Though I swear to god that tree looked like a creepy guy.....hey now I've only gotten 13 hours of sleep in the past five days...dammit i need to be awake by 12....Oh, I should also probably add in that we split a red bull and had a sugarload of sour patch kids cotton candy, which is nasty at first but gets sort of "morish" on you (as my mom said before she started spanking me and making S&M jokes...really, she did) And the four American Pie movies really helped too...funny how if i were doing work id've been dead 4 hours ago...ok ISK is getting tired and I should probably sleep, though this whole psycho conciousness thing is really fun.
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Thursday, February 01, 2007
Starbucks=Life
So I would be on my 3rd energy drink/ 5th (?) caffeneited beverage in 24 hours (the much feared 'full throttle', it was all blockbuster had, probably has something to do with it being owned by coke...monopolistic nazis)and watching every single American Pie film ever made (except American Wedding cuz blockbuster is annoying like that) except that my Indian Sex Kitty actually fell asleep during our "ten minute nap" almost two hours ago, so here I am blogging for both your and my entertainment. wheeeee!!
So I was working in Starbucks the other day (because that's pretty much all I do now, and yet I still manage to hand everything in late because I am a failure and a lazy ass with no time management skills who just won't learn to stop pushing it to the last minute and who has severly fucked herself over for like the third time and who is absolutley sick of always cramming shit at the last minute. Who would have thought that one three hour nap monday afternoon would fuck me over for the rest of the week? That said, I should probably be working on the rewrites that have been hanging over my head for like a week, But like I said, i've been doing nothing but papers since saturday night and there is simply no paper writing function left in me. the 13 hours of sleep over three days really helped too. Wow that was a long parenthetical rant.) ANYWAY I was being studious in starbucks and I looked up and saw a kid, couldn't have been older than 10, doing her Wordly Wise homework on the table next to me. I looked to the other side and saw a mom with two kids, maybe 8 and 5, looking equally productive. What has become of society?!? OK, Highschool and college students I get, but elementary school kids are now joining the regular starbucks workforce too? That is just wrong...
It's funny though, how starbucks turns into a noisy, brand-name beverage selling library on Sunday nights....go down and see for yourself sometime. It's all highschool students in little groups with their drinks and books. I really have to wonder how i ever got work done before this place popped up...pshh, the library...
Yeah so im pretty much the biggest dork on the face of the planet and it's getting worse and worse as time progresses. Or maybe I'm not because....
So I was working in Starbucks the other day (because that's pretty much all I do now, and yet I still manage to hand everything in late because I am a failure and a lazy ass with no time management skills who just won't learn to stop pushing it to the last minute and who has severly fucked herself over for like the third time and who is absolutley sick of always cramming shit at the last minute. Who would have thought that one three hour nap monday afternoon would fuck me over for the rest of the week? That said, I should probably be working on the rewrites that have been hanging over my head for like a week, But like I said, i've been doing nothing but papers since saturday night and there is simply no paper writing function left in me. the 13 hours of sleep over three days really helped too. Wow that was a long parenthetical rant.) ANYWAY I was being studious in starbucks and I looked up and saw a kid, couldn't have been older than 10, doing her Wordly Wise homework on the table next to me. I looked to the other side and saw a mom with two kids, maybe 8 and 5, looking equally productive. What has become of society?!? OK, Highschool and college students I get, but elementary school kids are now joining the regular starbucks workforce too? That is just wrong...
It's funny though, how starbucks turns into a noisy, brand-name beverage selling library on Sunday nights....go down and see for yourself sometime. It's all highschool students in little groups with their drinks and books. I really have to wonder how i ever got work done before this place popped up...pshh, the library...
Yeah so im pretty much the biggest dork on the face of the planet and it's getting worse and worse as time progresses. Or maybe I'm not because....
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Graph That!
...all on the floor, graph that! give me some more....graph that!
yeah, we can all thank koopon for that one. So today i realized that 1. i am way too lazy for my own good and have no self discipline (which should be reallllllly fun to explain to my advisor tomorrow) 2. I am so NOT on the honor roll for midterm so we can say bye to driving permissions (not that i really ever ask the deans anway so i dont really care...can i get a *snap*snap* for a 79 in Philo and Lit? yeah....i thought so...) and 3. now that i have embraced my failure, i may aswell enjoy what little ounce of life i have left before my male biological predecessor kills me, or I start actually doing work again to get my grades up for when it actually counts. Why did I apply to Harvard again?
So that's pretty much what I'm doing now....procrastinating the comp lab blogging with koopon who is doing his usual amusing babbling. Oh, and I wrote a newspaper article to put in some over-achiever points, though seriously sunday chapel does need to die. Why does society want us to be productive again? [insert polly rant here] Oh, and I wrote a short story for English that made me really happy (next time you see vertical just call him Hamlet) And shout outs to OSK too...though I heard about the fate of Batman...there's still hope...sorta....you never know. I could think of more things to write about but i'd probably end up ranting, being emo, and generally not being productive. I can tell myself that I will be productive later, but that's only after i've kicked my indian sex kitty out of my room or made her do work, which means about an hour later i'll want to go to bed. Ahh...dorm life. Duds Day tomorrow though, that should be fun even though I am wayyy overdue for laundry. And hopefully I can dye my hair and then wash it out before the Yale interview. College is taking over life. That is so wrong, but luckily only for the next 3-and-a-half-months. Wow...i dunno if that's too long or surprisingly soon....Oh well, nothing I can do about it now but study comp gov and pray to god I don't get waitlisted. Later!
oh, and shout outs to gavrich for those notes!
yeah, we can all thank koopon for that one. So today i realized that 1. i am way too lazy for my own good and have no self discipline (which should be reallllllly fun to explain to my advisor tomorrow) 2. I am so NOT on the honor roll for midterm so we can say bye to driving permissions (not that i really ever ask the deans anway so i dont really care...can i get a *snap*snap* for a 79 in Philo and Lit? yeah....i thought so...) and 3. now that i have embraced my failure, i may aswell enjoy what little ounce of life i have left before my male biological predecessor kills me, or I start actually doing work again to get my grades up for when it actually counts. Why did I apply to Harvard again?
So that's pretty much what I'm doing now....procrastinating the comp lab blogging with koopon who is doing his usual amusing babbling. Oh, and I wrote a newspaper article to put in some over-achiever points, though seriously sunday chapel does need to die. Why does society want us to be productive again? [insert polly rant here] Oh, and I wrote a short story for English that made me really happy (next time you see vertical just call him Hamlet) And shout outs to OSK too...though I heard about the fate of Batman...there's still hope...sorta....you never know. I could think of more things to write about but i'd probably end up ranting, being emo, and generally not being productive. I can tell myself that I will be productive later, but that's only after i've kicked my indian sex kitty out of my room or made her do work, which means about an hour later i'll want to go to bed. Ahh...dorm life. Duds Day tomorrow though, that should be fun even though I am wayyy overdue for laundry. And hopefully I can dye my hair and then wash it out before the Yale interview. College is taking over life. That is so wrong, but luckily only for the next 3-and-a-half-months. Wow...i dunno if that's too long or surprisingly soon....Oh well, nothing I can do about it now but study comp gov and pray to god I don't get waitlisted. Later!
oh, and shout outs to gavrich for those notes!
Sunday, January 14, 2007
Emo Blogging
If you don’t expect anything you’ll never be disappointed. It’s a proven fact, and it’s pretty much how I live my life. You’d think it would be the least emotionally dangerous way to go about things, seeing as you never get fucked over. but what they don’t tell you is that after years and years of not expecting anything, you may not get hurt by other people, but you end up hurting yourself even more, and it’s the kind of hurt that no one else can deliver quite as poignantly as you can. It’s not the crippling, painful blow that comes all at once when someone turns you down, but a creeping soreness that you don’t even realize is a pain until it’s disturbed. And once it is, there’s no going back.
When someone else tells you youre not good enough, you can always tell them they’re wrong or just run away from them. It sucks to have someone else disappoint you like that, which is why so many people (like myself) will go to crazy lengths to avoid just that situation. But really which is worse? Having someone else fuck you over and getting over it, or giving yourself just that tiny little pinch of “ just don’t bother” everyday until that part of you is so numb you don’t even realize you’re touching it. And when it does get jabbed a little harder than usual, it bleeds like hell until you can grow and even thicker scab, whose dried and flaky carnage slowly replaces the space that used to be saved for nerve endings.
Hello, my name is Juicy and my soul consists of a large clump of dried cells that don’t even have nuclei. Whatever you do, don’t turn out like me.
When someone else tells you youre not good enough, you can always tell them they’re wrong or just run away from them. It sucks to have someone else disappoint you like that, which is why so many people (like myself) will go to crazy lengths to avoid just that situation. But really which is worse? Having someone else fuck you over and getting over it, or giving yourself just that tiny little pinch of “ just don’t bother” everyday until that part of you is so numb you don’t even realize you’re touching it. And when it does get jabbed a little harder than usual, it bleeds like hell until you can grow and even thicker scab, whose dried and flaky carnage slowly replaces the space that used to be saved for nerve endings.
Hello, my name is Juicy and my soul consists of a large clump of dried cells that don’t even have nuclei. Whatever you do, don’t turn out like me.
Thursday, January 11, 2007
G+G+G+ Bitching
Hmm...so it's been awhile since I posted anything but it's hard to think of anything really significant to post about, seeing as my life in the winter can pretty much be summed up in the following three Gs:
-grades
-goaltending
-gossip whoring
(only not so much the first nowadays, oops...) So let's talk about the last one. The other night at dinner two friends and I were sitting around, and a little fac brat had a note addressed to a friend of ours. Not only did we spend half an hour or more trying to procure the note from this kid (since when do they make 11 year olds that look like six year olds that think like 16 year olds?) under the pretext that she was planning to give it to her facutly parent and we were doing the people that were actually meant to read the note a favor by intercepting it first. (cmon, its sorta true...) Anyway, the note didn't contain anything fantastic but getting it kept me amused for about forty-five minutes. (ohh...life metaphor!)And even if it did my new years resolution would prevent me from publishing it on the internet. *stick-out-tongue-smiley*
Like I said, the first G hasn't been getting too much attention in the past few days, but hopefully all that is about to change, or at least today it did. Did I mention that the stomach ache is God's gift to man? seriously...i don't wanna go all Odysseus and jinx myself here (yes, it's happened) but you just go in, look sad, say you have a stomach ache, go to sleep for as long as you want, then wake up and Bam! It's Juicy's Day Off! Not that I did anything nearly as cool as Bueller, but walking around the cafeteria in your PJs while all your friends still have to go to class has its perks...not to mention the getting caught up with everything and not stressing out while listening to mediocre radio all day. It seems too good to be true...That, and the fact that just one slim doorway stands between me and freedom at 3am on a saturday. Well, more like a slim doorway and my friend's "Juicy-really-now-I-care-about-you-and-dont-want-you-to-get-kicked-out-of-school-and-not-get-into-college-and-make-the-stupidest-mistake-of-your-life" eyes. Who came up with this whole 'real freinds' idea again?
so yeah that's pretty much my pathetic life in a nutshell. Funny word, pathetic. It means weak, or in some other way generally unworthy, But i can't help but recognize the greek root "pathos" which I'm almost sure means "feelings." Perhaps the Nazis and myself weren't the first? just a thought...Another great word that comes to mind is "whorish," for example, "my fantastically whorish shoes that I love to death even though my heels still hurt." psh...objectifying women in the media...seriously...that presentation was smart and funny but can you grab me a drink? thanks. Though if she did have a point about one thing, guys in this country are spoiled. Just turn on the TV and watch a few adds, at least half of them will contain a nude or partially clad woman with long hair and perfect skin. No wonder the East hates us...
-grades
-goaltending
-gossip whoring
(only not so much the first nowadays, oops...) So let's talk about the last one. The other night at dinner two friends and I were sitting around, and a little fac brat had a note addressed to a friend of ours. Not only did we spend half an hour or more trying to procure the note from this kid (since when do they make 11 year olds that look like six year olds that think like 16 year olds?) under the pretext that she was planning to give it to her facutly parent and we were doing the people that were actually meant to read the note a favor by intercepting it first. (cmon, its sorta true...) Anyway, the note didn't contain anything fantastic but getting it kept me amused for about forty-five minutes. (ohh...life metaphor!)And even if it did my new years resolution would prevent me from publishing it on the internet. *stick-out-tongue-smiley*
Like I said, the first G hasn't been getting too much attention in the past few days, but hopefully all that is about to change, or at least today it did. Did I mention that the stomach ache is God's gift to man? seriously...i don't wanna go all Odysseus and jinx myself here (yes, it's happened) but you just go in, look sad, say you have a stomach ache, go to sleep for as long as you want, then wake up and Bam! It's Juicy's Day Off! Not that I did anything nearly as cool as Bueller, but walking around the cafeteria in your PJs while all your friends still have to go to class has its perks...not to mention the getting caught up with everything and not stressing out while listening to mediocre radio all day. It seems too good to be true...That, and the fact that just one slim doorway stands between me and freedom at 3am on a saturday. Well, more like a slim doorway and my friend's "Juicy-really-now-I-care-about-you-and-dont-want-you-to-get-kicked-out-of-school-and-not-get-into-college-and-make-the-stupidest-mistake-of-your-life" eyes. Who came up with this whole 'real freinds' idea again?
so yeah that's pretty much my pathetic life in a nutshell. Funny word, pathetic. It means weak, or in some other way generally unworthy, But i can't help but recognize the greek root "pathos" which I'm almost sure means "feelings." Perhaps the Nazis and myself weren't the first? just a thought...Another great word that comes to mind is "whorish," for example, "my fantastically whorish shoes that I love to death even though my heels still hurt." psh...objectifying women in the media...seriously...that presentation was smart and funny but can you grab me a drink? thanks. Though if she did have a point about one thing, guys in this country are spoiled. Just turn on the TV and watch a few adds, at least half of them will contain a nude or partially clad woman with long hair and perfect skin. No wonder the East hates us...
Monday, January 01, 2007
Roadtrip Plan B (AKA "The Pina Colada Song")
I brought up the whole summer roadtrip with my Dad, and as can be expected he wasn't too gung-ho about it, but he didn't completely disqualify it either. But what he did do was pretty damn cool. Im not sure if he realized what he was getting himself into at the time, but as my graduation present he offered to fly us all (he has like 5 million FF miles) down to St. Croix and pay for basic necessities.
Now I know the Zs aren't crazy about the beach, but THINK about this...St. Croix is a small tropical island in the USVI. We own a condoe on the beach that also has a swimming pool and a snack shack. There are two bedrooms and a couch, so if we really squish we could fit six people. While we are down there we could go to the beach, snorkel/scuba dive, play ping pong, take boat trips to buck island (the kind of deserted island you see in TV commercials), shop around in town duty free, maybe hit some casinos/clubs and probably find a ton of other fun random things to do. (plus i have this amusing image in my head of bagel trying to make friends with a drugged out rasta, vertical trying to shimmy up a palm tree, and josh on the beach with three girls looking like even more of a pimp) Oh, and did i mention the drinking age is 18 and practically a joke? it would be like friggen spring break. Not to mention I've been going to the island since i was a baby so I'm pretty famialir with it and all the parents might feel better about this than a random roadtrip. I'm still all for the roadtrip, but if it doesn't work out you must admit an unsupervised tropical vacation is a pretty damned good back up option...comments?
Now I know the Zs aren't crazy about the beach, but THINK about this...St. Croix is a small tropical island in the USVI. We own a condoe on the beach that also has a swimming pool and a snack shack. There are two bedrooms and a couch, so if we really squish we could fit six people. While we are down there we could go to the beach, snorkel/scuba dive, play ping pong, take boat trips to buck island (the kind of deserted island you see in TV commercials), shop around in town duty free, maybe hit some casinos/clubs and probably find a ton of other fun random things to do. (plus i have this amusing image in my head of bagel trying to make friends with a drugged out rasta, vertical trying to shimmy up a palm tree, and josh on the beach with three girls looking like even more of a pimp) Oh, and did i mention the drinking age is 18 and practically a joke? it would be like friggen spring break. Not to mention I've been going to the island since i was a baby so I'm pretty famialir with it and all the parents might feel better about this than a random roadtrip. I'm still all for the roadtrip, but if it doesn't work out you must admit an unsupervised tropical vacation is a pretty damned good back up option...comments?
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Hello, Juicy, You Have 1 New Message...
So i've been wasting a lot of time online this break, which means i've essentially been wasting a lot of time on facebook finding old friends and relations to add to my ever-expanding blackhole of a friends page. But when you start friending people like your friend's friend who you hung out with a lot in elementary school, you need to ask yourself, is this really good for society? yeah it's cool to see that they still exist, and maybe add 'em to your friends list for the hell of it, but we know that the awkward wall or message conversation really cannot last or develop into anything. Why add that pressure?(then again, I thought I wouldn't still be talking to half of my old friends and I am, so I guess I'm not the best judge when it comes to longevity and quality. Infact, I just remembered that I once randomly remet someone and it actually lasted awhile was probably the closest thing ive ever had to a relationship...oops)
ANYWAY my point was that even though there are some people who are fun to reconnect with, there are other people that need to just be left in the past, and people don't always see eye-to-eye on this. As great as facebook is for the reconnecting bit, it makes things sort of awkward when you get poked by someone you're really not to keen to talk to again (even if it is just cuz, as i recently realized, im a bitch.) And plus I honestly don't think it leaves a lot of room for personal growth if you're always forced into awkward conversations with people from your past whom you never knew that well anyway. Then again, I guess just not returning a FB message is nothing to get pissy about...yeah that was pointless, here's a quiz-
Juicy is poked by a friend/person-that-asked-her-out-and-failed that she knows from 3 years ago but has since blocked. she follws decorum and returns the poke, also enabling her to view his profile. Should she
a. friend him out of curiosity/boredom
b. friend him out of curiosity/boredom and say hi because she now feels bad for treating him like shit
c. tell her mom to buy more snackfoods
d. do nothing
(for the record, she cant see personal info and the picture is nothing fab. if she ever saw this person in real life, she would probably hide)
ANYWAY my point was that even though there are some people who are fun to reconnect with, there are other people that need to just be left in the past, and people don't always see eye-to-eye on this. As great as facebook is for the reconnecting bit, it makes things sort of awkward when you get poked by someone you're really not to keen to talk to again (even if it is just cuz, as i recently realized, im a bitch.) And plus I honestly don't think it leaves a lot of room for personal growth if you're always forced into awkward conversations with people from your past whom you never knew that well anyway. Then again, I guess just not returning a FB message is nothing to get pissy about...yeah that was pointless, here's a quiz-
Juicy is poked by a friend/person-that-asked-her-out-and-failed that she knows from 3 years ago but has since blocked. she follws decorum and returns the poke, also enabling her to view his profile. Should she
a. friend him out of curiosity/boredom
b. friend him out of curiosity/boredom and say hi because she now feels bad for treating him like shit
c. tell her mom to buy more snackfoods
d. do nothing
(for the record, she cant see personal info and the picture is nothing fab. if she ever saw this person in real life, she would probably hide)
Thursday, December 14, 2006
mmm...Nexusy
Once upon a time, there was a litte Nexus of Fate. The Nexus was studying hard so she could get into college, but realized she was essentially screwed for an upcoming test. She was pretty desperate, so completely on a whim she asked someone else for help, and was quickly presented with her next celestial assignment. Upon talking to this new found acquaintance, she learned that he had spent a large quantity of time pining over someone that was probably not very good for him. Perhaps the Nexus was feeling guilty for having treated some other guys like this, or perhaps she just recognized someone that needed a little help, but she was determined to help this person out.
It would be a lie to say that the Nexus had not devised a more selfish method of doing that, and she must confess this made her very happy, but a Nexus knows when the fates are at work. (She also knows when to tip off a slightly-too-oblivoius friend about her own feelings, and when to tell someone that if they don't go for it they're an idiot.)
In the past two weeks, the Nexus was not able to help noticing all the good things that were happenning to all of her other friends aswell. (Can she get an 'i told ya so!') The only annoying thing about being a Nexus of Fate is that there really isn't a Nexus-of-Fate dating service for highschoolers, but a Nexus learns to accept her existance as a singular entity. She asks only to be able to third-wheel every now and then, and gets much joy from seeing all of her friends so happy from her help. The priority decision deadline for Harvard is tomorrow, and Brown is january 1st. Maybe if her friends have had a little aid from the Fates, the Nexus could get her share too. And then maybe, if she's really lucky, she'll meet another Nexus of Fate to be, well, Nexusy with...
It would be a lie to say that the Nexus had not devised a more selfish method of doing that, and she must confess this made her very happy, but a Nexus knows when the fates are at work. (She also knows when to tip off a slightly-too-oblivoius friend about her own feelings, and when to tell someone that if they don't go for it they're an idiot.)
In the past two weeks, the Nexus was not able to help noticing all the good things that were happenning to all of her other friends aswell. (Can she get an 'i told ya so!') The only annoying thing about being a Nexus of Fate is that there really isn't a Nexus-of-Fate dating service for highschoolers, but a Nexus learns to accept her existance as a singular entity. She asks only to be able to third-wheel every now and then, and gets much joy from seeing all of her friends so happy from her help. The priority decision deadline for Harvard is tomorrow, and Brown is january 1st. Maybe if her friends have had a little aid from the Fates, the Nexus could get her share too. And then maybe, if she's really lucky, she'll meet another Nexus of Fate to be, well, Nexusy with...
Sunday, December 03, 2006
Let's Talk About Feelings!
Mmm...feelings. well, actually no. what I want to talk about is the futility of them. Here is just how peachy life is at the moment:
Ok so originally I was gonna write out all the shit that's going on with people at the moment in the anonymous third person, but y'all know who you are and if you want my juicy advice you can have it. I'm bound to give something away that I shouldn't and I don't want to piss people off. The overall point was that everyone sees things differently. One comment from someone can be interpreted or ignored ten different ways from ten different people. Everyone seems to have a different idea of what's going on even between those very close to them. It'd be nice to think that just by spilling everything and clarifying it for everybody I could make life easier, but I can't do that. In fact, even the people directly invovled don't always know what they want, and I'm starting to think it's near impossible, or at least extremely rare, to find two people with slightly more than friendly feelings for each other who are invovled in a perfectly balanced relationship. (then again, maybe i'm just hanging around my kooky highschool friends too much)
So yeah that's pretty much my rant for the day. Hopefully I can translate some of this brilliant cynicism into my college supplements, but probably not.
Ok so originally I was gonna write out all the shit that's going on with people at the moment in the anonymous third person, but y'all know who you are and if you want my juicy advice you can have it. I'm bound to give something away that I shouldn't and I don't want to piss people off. The overall point was that everyone sees things differently. One comment from someone can be interpreted or ignored ten different ways from ten different people. Everyone seems to have a different idea of what's going on even between those very close to them. It'd be nice to think that just by spilling everything and clarifying it for everybody I could make life easier, but I can't do that. In fact, even the people directly invovled don't always know what they want, and I'm starting to think it's near impossible, or at least extremely rare, to find two people with slightly more than friendly feelings for each other who are invovled in a perfectly balanced relationship. (then again, maybe i'm just hanging around my kooky highschool friends too much)
So yeah that's pretty much my rant for the day. Hopefully I can translate some of this brilliant cynicism into my college supplements, but probably not.
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Life
Yesterday and today have been two of those days that seem so typical it's abnormal. What did i do? I was productive. that essentially sums it up. I did work, I practiced a song with a group, i organized stuff for the art club, i did class ring stuff, all of which i enjoy and get to write on my college app. (except the ring thing, thats just cuz im cool) I saw my friends a bit, i slept a bit, i played hockey. There's no drama, no big gossip, things are just, well, peaceful. I have no complaints except sore muscles/stomach and the inverse proportion of sleep and work. In other words, it's pretty wierd. maybe im just a masochist who needs something to bitch about, or maybe i finally got my life together, but it feels weird not having anything major on my mind. Today i was sitting in class and i remembered my first year at this highschool. I thought about how different everything has become since then, and how i never would have expected this in a million years. For the first time in awhile i guess, things balanced out. full circle. they did it just in time too, because then i was flipping through my agenda pad, opened up to april, and realized that by then i will know where i am going to college. freaky, huh?
on a similar note, Not to get too emo on you all, but as busy as ive been these past few days I feel a sortof internal bordom setting in. (or maybe im just in a wierd mood from working alot/sleep deprived) So if you ever want to do something spontaneous like go climb a mountain or take a roadtrip to nowhere and get lost (i still think thats a great idea...) let me in on it before i become another mindless zombie in a productive society that has no real direction. it has speed, but not velocity...snap!!
...yeah on that pathetic note ill return to british parliament....im getting sorta sick of this whole school thing and i can't beleive its another four more years, but what else can i do? hopefully college will rock, but thats another story. till then, i have disco....
on a similar note, Not to get too emo on you all, but as busy as ive been these past few days I feel a sortof internal bordom setting in. (or maybe im just in a wierd mood from working alot/sleep deprived) So if you ever want to do something spontaneous like go climb a mountain or take a roadtrip to nowhere and get lost (i still think thats a great idea...) let me in on it before i become another mindless zombie in a productive society that has no real direction. it has speed, but not velocity...snap!!
...yeah on that pathetic note ill return to british parliament....im getting sorta sick of this whole school thing and i can't beleive its another four more years, but what else can i do? hopefully college will rock, but thats another story. till then, i have disco....
Friday, November 24, 2006
Turkey Day...Oh, and you might want to read this for future notice...
So it was Thanksgiving yesterday and I feel that yields a blogpost even though there really isn't much to say. I lovvvvved the food, and it was fun actually helping with the cooking this year and taking responsibility of the stuffing, even though my dad will probably not let me within ten feet of any alcholic beverage ever again. (not that i was actually drinking or anything, its just that the general excitement of the holiday made me a bit tizzy and then knocked me out on the couch for two hours)
On a similar note, I finally decided where I am going to apply to college, I'd tell you where, but we had this presentation that freaked me out and I don't wanna be denied school number 2 just because they read this and realize they're not school number 1 even though I totally could have changed my mind.
Ok, what the fuck is wrong here. This is my blog and it's getting way too PC. I cannot feel that I can fully express myself if I think there is an admissions reader constantly searching the net for this stuff and dying for any excuse to not read the huge stack of papers in my file infront of him. I am aware that whatever
I publish is technically open for all to see, but by choosing the username I did and by refusing to give out the information I did not release, it is clear that my identity is to be kept anonymous to all readers whom I am not already familiar with. In short- this is bullshit. If i gave you all my full name and address then fine, i guess i was asking for it, but if any admissions officer is going to get all sneaky on me and start hunting for incriminating evidence in supposedly anonymous blog posts, then that makes me really upset. I worked really hard on those apps for a reason, and i don't think they should be counteracted by something as casual as a blog. And how would you like it if i went hunting for all your dirty secrets on the internet? This pissses me off, People have a right to privacy, especially when it is as specifically implied as it is here. This actually makes me want to become and ACLU lawyer even more (Because if you don't trust me already, admissions officer, I wasn't lying about that)
In fact, I think i'll give myself some practice:
By reading this blog and absorbing its contents, you ,the reader, have agreed to not share any of the found information in a way that could be slanderous or in any other way harmful or discrediting to the author or those associated with her.
Ha! Take that bitches!!!
On a similar note, I finally decided where I am going to apply to college, I'd tell you where, but we had this presentation that freaked me out and I don't wanna be denied school number 2 just because they read this and realize they're not school number 1 even though I totally could have changed my mind.
Ok, what the fuck is wrong here. This is my blog and it's getting way too PC. I cannot feel that I can fully express myself if I think there is an admissions reader constantly searching the net for this stuff and dying for any excuse to not read the huge stack of papers in my file infront of him. I am aware that whatever
I publish is technically open for all to see, but by choosing the username I did and by refusing to give out the information I did not release, it is clear that my identity is to be kept anonymous to all readers whom I am not already familiar with. In short- this is bullshit. If i gave you all my full name and address then fine, i guess i was asking for it, but if any admissions officer is going to get all sneaky on me and start hunting for incriminating evidence in supposedly anonymous blog posts, then that makes me really upset. I worked really hard on those apps for a reason, and i don't think they should be counteracted by something as casual as a blog. And how would you like it if i went hunting for all your dirty secrets on the internet? This pissses me off, People have a right to privacy, especially when it is as specifically implied as it is here. This actually makes me want to become and ACLU lawyer even more (Because if you don't trust me already, admissions officer, I wasn't lying about that)
In fact, I think i'll give myself some practice:
By reading this blog and absorbing its contents, you ,the reader, have agreed to not share any of the found information in a way that could be slanderous or in any other way harmful or discrediting to the author or those associated with her.
Ha! Take that bitches!!!
Monday, November 20, 2006
If You're Still Reading This, I Don't Know Whether to Be Flattered or A Little Sketched Out
Oh well who cares, I enjoy the company. Here's what's been on my mind:
So I was out to lunch with my aunt today and they were playing all these really old songs in the restaurant. The kind that have trumpets and keyboards creating the kind of beats you can picture people dancing to back in the 1950s wearing letterman jackets and bowling shoes. Now don't get me wrong, i have 110% nothing against grinding, and if im attracted to someone then fully rubbing up against them is definitley on the top of the to-do list, but it is sort of nice to think back to a time when dancing took effort as opposed to just satisfying base physical urges. When you think about it, its almost typical of modern society. Why waste time wining and dining someone when you both just wanna get it on? If you're dancing with someone, why bother with all the twists and turns when all you really want to do is get as close to them as physically possible while you still have clothes on? its not that the provocativity of grinding is a let down, its just that compared to old school dancing, it's pretty uncreative and uneventful. Just because dancing serves as a way to satisfy sexual urges, that doesn't mean that that's all it has to do. In fact, i'm sure it could be a lot more fun if people mixed it up a little. (not that juicy doesn't enjoy getting essentially assraped once in awhile...no, seriously, she doesnt, but well talk about that later)
oh yeah, and that little thing called romance...
I blame those stupid Macy's christmas commercials. Seriously, how am I supposed to continue a healthily cynical and bitter existance when every five seconds it's "with love, from me, to you!" and all those happy couples being all....couply. God, before you know it i'll be getting excited about christmas (despite the futility of it) and then you can start throwing snowballs down to hell and watch them freeze over (cuz the ice in my veins has to go somewhere...)
now these thoughts must have been apparant as i was eating, because then completely out of the blue i was presented with the one question 'feared by singles everywhere' (gotta love Bridget Jones)- "So Juicy, How's Your Love Life?" Those exact words i am not even kidding. I'm not sure what's worse- the story itself or that I actually told my aunt about it. But after all is said and done: yes, i am 17. Yes, i am probably going to graduate alone. Yes, i can accept that, now let's not parade it infront of the rest of my relatives, ok? I guess it could be worse, at least they don't think im gay yet (though the other night my dad did say 'significant other,' that was wierd...)
oh btw, that person who posted about joe y on my last post, who are you you're sorta creeping me out. As for the people i know who actually read this blog (if there are any left) i think it'd be really fun to have a christmas party and do secret santas and....oh god, it's started already...
So I was out to lunch with my aunt today and they were playing all these really old songs in the restaurant. The kind that have trumpets and keyboards creating the kind of beats you can picture people dancing to back in the 1950s wearing letterman jackets and bowling shoes. Now don't get me wrong, i have 110% nothing against grinding, and if im attracted to someone then fully rubbing up against them is definitley on the top of the to-do list, but it is sort of nice to think back to a time when dancing took effort as opposed to just satisfying base physical urges. When you think about it, its almost typical of modern society. Why waste time wining and dining someone when you both just wanna get it on? If you're dancing with someone, why bother with all the twists and turns when all you really want to do is get as close to them as physically possible while you still have clothes on? its not that the provocativity of grinding is a let down, its just that compared to old school dancing, it's pretty uncreative and uneventful. Just because dancing serves as a way to satisfy sexual urges, that doesn't mean that that's all it has to do. In fact, i'm sure it could be a lot more fun if people mixed it up a little. (not that juicy doesn't enjoy getting essentially assraped once in awhile...no, seriously, she doesnt, but well talk about that later)
oh yeah, and that little thing called romance...
I blame those stupid Macy's christmas commercials. Seriously, how am I supposed to continue a healthily cynical and bitter existance when every five seconds it's "with love, from me, to you!" and all those happy couples being all....couply. God, before you know it i'll be getting excited about christmas (despite the futility of it) and then you can start throwing snowballs down to hell and watch them freeze over (cuz the ice in my veins has to go somewhere...)
now these thoughts must have been apparant as i was eating, because then completely out of the blue i was presented with the one question 'feared by singles everywhere' (gotta love Bridget Jones)- "So Juicy, How's Your Love Life?" Those exact words i am not even kidding. I'm not sure what's worse- the story itself or that I actually told my aunt about it. But after all is said and done: yes, i am 17. Yes, i am probably going to graduate alone. Yes, i can accept that, now let's not parade it infront of the rest of my relatives, ok? I guess it could be worse, at least they don't think im gay yet (though the other night my dad did say 'significant other,' that was wierd...)
oh btw, that person who posted about joe y on my last post, who are you you're sorta creeping me out. As for the people i know who actually read this blog (if there are any left) i think it'd be really fun to have a christmas party and do secret santas and....oh god, it's started already...
Sunday, October 22, 2006
This Blog Made Possible From Viewers Like You...
Ok, because I am the coolest person ever I have spent the past 3 hours of my life infront of the television watching PBS. Ironically, I was at my dad's house where i do have cable, and perhaps this is just the result of my half-asleep haze, but i must admit that is some quality television...
the first thing that really caught my interest was a show called Roadtrip Nation. PBS sponsors 3 groups of friends from different countries on a roadtrip across north america to talk to people and find out more about what they want to do with their lives. This reminded me of something I've been wanting to do for ages, even before the whole roadtrip thing started the past summer. Seriously, I don't even really care who comes so long as i get to drive from connecticut to california, and really learn about what it means to be an American along the way. Our country is vastly diverse, and im sure that one cannot even begin to imagine how many billions of individual life stories from billions of different perspectives are waiting to be told. I have lived my entire life in a tiny little state in a tiny little portion of one of the largest and most influential countries in the world, and i want to see what the rest of it is all about.
the second show offered caught my interest because of its relativity to an upcoming paper i have due in my comparitive government class. (you laugh now, but just wait...) It informed me of the Clean Elections Campaign movement. This movement advocates that, because of the mass pecunial-based corruption in politics, canidates should have the option to run for election on public money if they can gain enough signatures and small 5 dollar contributions. They would have to agree however, to accept no donations from lobbyists and allow their time in office/while campaigning to be open to total scrutiny by the public. Though there are flaws to this plan (possible waste of taxpayer's money, and perhaps a little too much descriptive representation as just about anyone popular enough can run) I think that over all it is a good idea. Regardless of the specifics of the plan, I am glad to see that so many people are also aggrivated with how corrupt our political system is, and the desperate need for some sort of reform that will make politics more productive in actually meeting the needs of the people. One of my favorite fetures of the plan is that because canidates need to win over massive public support inorder to qualify, they will spend more time campaging from door to door and personally getting those five dollar contributions (that almost anyone can give) and signatures than talking to only a wealthy few.
But this also made me ask another question: once you're donating money into the hundreds of thousands of dollars, is it really going to make that much of a difference in your campaign's sucess? obviously money is needed to make pamphlets and T shirts, but does the flashy, pretty looking pamphlet really convince you more than the plain one regardless of the ideas inside it? I know that that's probably true, but doesnt that just make you feel a little bit ashamed, that your opinion is so easily swayed by something so superficial? we've known for a long time that money is power, but should it be?
(on the same note, i must admit that the PBS commercial to give them more money was very convincing, Is PBS really not owned by the govt? I always thought it was....Because if it seriously isn't owened by the govt or a major corporation and just doing this for the people like they said i am def considering a donation... not to mention their needy begging usually annoys the heck out of me and it's a few dollars closer to them shutting up if they ever will)
What else is going on in my life? pretty much the usual nothing. I realized that my optometric prescrition has doubled in the past two years with me barely realizing it (yes, i may have been driving next to you) so now i'm gonna wear my glasses more often. Plus, i just got a really cute pair of purple ones that (hopefully) dont look as dorky as my old ones. My dad might finally let me drive with my friend (yayyy!) and my awesome-sexy-red-shoes came but theyre a size too big, so we'll all have to wait another month to see juicy's feet at their finest. I almost had and ED/EA related epiphany, but I still think Im'm gonna wait it out to regular decision, though I am a little frightened that I wont get in to either Brown or Harvard and will be wanting to shoot my current self. Any Advice? I'll give the full pros and cons another time.
the first thing that really caught my interest was a show called Roadtrip Nation. PBS sponsors 3 groups of friends from different countries on a roadtrip across north america to talk to people and find out more about what they want to do with their lives. This reminded me of something I've been wanting to do for ages, even before the whole roadtrip thing started the past summer. Seriously, I don't even really care who comes so long as i get to drive from connecticut to california, and really learn about what it means to be an American along the way. Our country is vastly diverse, and im sure that one cannot even begin to imagine how many billions of individual life stories from billions of different perspectives are waiting to be told. I have lived my entire life in a tiny little state in a tiny little portion of one of the largest and most influential countries in the world, and i want to see what the rest of it is all about.
the second show offered caught my interest because of its relativity to an upcoming paper i have due in my comparitive government class. (you laugh now, but just wait...) It informed me of the Clean Elections Campaign movement. This movement advocates that, because of the mass pecunial-based corruption in politics, canidates should have the option to run for election on public money if they can gain enough signatures and small 5 dollar contributions. They would have to agree however, to accept no donations from lobbyists and allow their time in office/while campaigning to be open to total scrutiny by the public. Though there are flaws to this plan (possible waste of taxpayer's money, and perhaps a little too much descriptive representation as just about anyone popular enough can run) I think that over all it is a good idea. Regardless of the specifics of the plan, I am glad to see that so many people are also aggrivated with how corrupt our political system is, and the desperate need for some sort of reform that will make politics more productive in actually meeting the needs of the people. One of my favorite fetures of the plan is that because canidates need to win over massive public support inorder to qualify, they will spend more time campaging from door to door and personally getting those five dollar contributions (that almost anyone can give) and signatures than talking to only a wealthy few.
But this also made me ask another question: once you're donating money into the hundreds of thousands of dollars, is it really going to make that much of a difference in your campaign's sucess? obviously money is needed to make pamphlets and T shirts, but does the flashy, pretty looking pamphlet really convince you more than the plain one regardless of the ideas inside it? I know that that's probably true, but doesnt that just make you feel a little bit ashamed, that your opinion is so easily swayed by something so superficial? we've known for a long time that money is power, but should it be?
(on the same note, i must admit that the PBS commercial to give them more money was very convincing, Is PBS really not owned by the govt? I always thought it was....Because if it seriously isn't owened by the govt or a major corporation and just doing this for the people like they said i am def considering a donation... not to mention their needy begging usually annoys the heck out of me and it's a few dollars closer to them shutting up if they ever will)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What else is going on in my life? pretty much the usual nothing. I realized that my optometric prescrition has doubled in the past two years with me barely realizing it (yes, i may have been driving next to you) so now i'm gonna wear my glasses more often. Plus, i just got a really cute pair of purple ones that (hopefully) dont look as dorky as my old ones. My dad might finally let me drive with my friend (yayyy!) and my awesome-sexy-red-shoes came but theyre a size too big, so we'll all have to wait another month to see juicy's feet at their finest. I almost had and ED/EA related epiphany, but I still think Im'm gonna wait it out to regular decision, though I am a little frightened that I wont get in to either Brown or Harvard and will be wanting to shoot my current self. Any Advice? I'll give the full pros and cons another time.
Saturday, October 14, 2006
20 Questions
So vertical had this funky questionairre thing, and I have four hours of free time, so here goes:
1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
a serial killer/rapist/pedophile/terrorist that would ruin countless lives otherwise
2.You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?
there are so many...just one is not nearly enough...
3.Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
probably some obnoxious bigot or chauvanist, or anyone who makes fun of my boobs
4.What is your favorite cheese?
this camembert with fruit in it, or baked brie with fruit and nuts on top. cheese-in-a-can is also there, but im not sure if it counts...
5.You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make? sloppy joe, or six-inch-lettuce/cheese/tomato/mayo-on-honey-oat-bread (yes, i can do that all in one breath)
6.You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice? hm...probably jack sparrow (not johnny depp, jack sparrow) or gordo from lizzie maguire
7.You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick? Slash from like 20 years ago when he was on the cover of rolling stone, omggggg
8. Now that you've slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy shit, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it? i save part of it, the rest will eventually go to Starbucks and clothing, namely shoes (*feels bad* and maybe the african kids will get some too...)
9.You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? Europe
10.Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Shit! Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do? somehow fly one of my friends over mad cheap, and spend the rest of the money barhopping
11.An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is...? smirnoff ice, any flavor
12.Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there? probably 4pm any weekday in the summer. im hanging out with my friends at the pool club or at home (aka doing nothing) then getting online and drinking and talking to people for like 4 hours (again, aka doing nothing) sleep. repeat.
13.You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? no rules, just right...
14.You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what's the premise? "awkward"-me and my friends lives at boarding school
15.What is your favorite curse word? Fuck (esp. when combined with shit, ie, Shitfuckers!!!!)
16.One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, they're just standing around your bed. What do you do? call the shrink, i've finally snapped
17.Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don't worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely.So what's the item? am I a horrible person for saying my cash stash? laptop is probably more practical, or all my legal documents. (sorry for being so boring and practical, maybe my yearbooks or stuffed cow/bear when you get down the list...)
18.The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour? sex...just, sex....(preferably with someone attractive but im not gonna be picky on my death bed)
19.You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What's it gonna be? no thanks, my nexus powers are already enough (i also happen to be the Daughter of God)
20.You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again? didnt you just ask that? though i do have a bunch of things from middle school, like dousing paul gamble with capri sun or winning the arm wrestling match in bio just to name a few...
21.You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? none, shit happens, how you deal with it helps shape who you are (though i suppose thinking i was actually gonna die last year sorta sucked...)
22.You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit... you can move to anywhere else in the world! Bitchin'! What country are you going to live in now? England or France (or start my own country, mwhahahah!)
23.This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. Check it out. You have been eternally banned from every single bar in the world except for ONE.Which one is it gonna be? the beach shack where we go on vacation, shout outs to JJ and Bob!!
24.Hopefully you didn't mention this in the super-powers question.... If you did, then we'll just expand on that. Check it out... Suddenly, you have gained the ability to FLOAT!!! Whose house are you going to float to first, and be like "Dude, check it out... I can FLOAT!"? Bagel's...as if his mom doesn't already think im enough of a wierdo...
25.The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life? Jesus
26.The Celestial Gates of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn't think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person, etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? maybe my paternal grandma, never really knew her too well, no one reallllllly close to me has ever died (luckily) so i might ask one of my older relatives or friends what they want and do them a favor.
27.What's your theme song?
depends on my mood, though I want them to play "I hope you dance" at my funeral
1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
a serial killer/rapist/pedophile/terrorist that would ruin countless lives otherwise
2.You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?
there are so many...just one is not nearly enough...
3.Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
probably some obnoxious bigot or chauvanist, or anyone who makes fun of my boobs
4.What is your favorite cheese?
this camembert with fruit in it, or baked brie with fruit and nuts on top. cheese-in-a-can is also there, but im not sure if it counts...
5.You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make? sloppy joe, or six-inch-lettuce/cheese/tomato/mayo-on-honey-oat-bread (yes, i can do that all in one breath)
6.You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice? hm...probably jack sparrow (not johnny depp, jack sparrow) or gordo from lizzie maguire
7.You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick? Slash from like 20 years ago when he was on the cover of rolling stone, omggggg
8. Now that you've slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy shit, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it? i save part of it, the rest will eventually go to Starbucks and clothing, namely shoes (*feels bad* and maybe the african kids will get some too...)
9.You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? Europe
10.Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Shit! Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do? somehow fly one of my friends over mad cheap, and spend the rest of the money barhopping
11.An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is...? smirnoff ice, any flavor
12.Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there? probably 4pm any weekday in the summer. im hanging out with my friends at the pool club or at home (aka doing nothing) then getting online and drinking and talking to people for like 4 hours (again, aka doing nothing) sleep. repeat.
13.You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? no rules, just right...
14.You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what's the premise? "awkward"-me and my friends lives at boarding school
15.What is your favorite curse word? Fuck (esp. when combined with shit, ie, Shitfuckers!!!!)
16.One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, they're just standing around your bed. What do you do? call the shrink, i've finally snapped
17.Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don't worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely.So what's the item? am I a horrible person for saying my cash stash? laptop is probably more practical, or all my legal documents. (sorry for being so boring and practical, maybe my yearbooks or stuffed cow/bear when you get down the list...)
18.The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour? sex...just, sex....(preferably with someone attractive but im not gonna be picky on my death bed)
19.You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What's it gonna be? no thanks, my nexus powers are already enough (i also happen to be the Daughter of God)
20.You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again? didnt you just ask that? though i do have a bunch of things from middle school, like dousing paul gamble with capri sun or winning the arm wrestling match in bio just to name a few...
21.You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? none, shit happens, how you deal with it helps shape who you are (though i suppose thinking i was actually gonna die last year sorta sucked...)
22.You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit... you can move to anywhere else in the world! Bitchin'! What country are you going to live in now? England or France (or start my own country, mwhahahah!)
23.This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. Check it out. You have been eternally banned from every single bar in the world except for ONE.Which one is it gonna be? the beach shack where we go on vacation, shout outs to JJ and Bob!!
24.Hopefully you didn't mention this in the super-powers question.... If you did, then we'll just expand on that. Check it out... Suddenly, you have gained the ability to FLOAT!!! Whose house are you going to float to first, and be like "Dude, check it out... I can FLOAT!"? Bagel's...as if his mom doesn't already think im enough of a wierdo...
25.The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life? Jesus
26.The Celestial Gates of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn't think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person, etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? maybe my paternal grandma, never really knew her too well, no one reallllllly close to me has ever died (luckily) so i might ask one of my older relatives or friends what they want and do them a favor.
27.What's your theme song?
depends on my mood, though I want them to play "I hope you dance" at my funeral
Friday, October 13, 2006
Wow This is a Pathetic Post...
Ok, for those of you that do not know me, i go to a school where we have a half day of school on wednesdays and saturdays instead of a full day on wednesday. I dont normally mind this, except I dont really get that much sleep (at least not when im actually working hard)
But this weekend is special. I have no classes saturday, i am not taking the evviiiill SATs again, and my afternoon program starts whnever i want it too. In other words: pARTAYYYYY!!!!
..well, actually no. We had this really funny SAT dinner (which is def the most ive laughed in a month, how sad is that...) i've been online for an hour, and in another 30 minutes my friend and i are watching Nip Tuck on DVD. I will probably be passed out after 2 episodes. I finally have a real weekend, and this is what i do with it...(i was considering getting ahead in my work, but that might be too shameful even for me) Seriously. What is school doing to my already barely- existant-by-a-thread life? I suppose i would have more to do if all my other friends were also not having class/not taking the SATS/ not going to a wedding, but still....Where's the highschool we've always wanted? How did I end up here again? WHERE ARE THE KEGS MAN??
oh well, im going home next weekend, this is def inspiration to make it kick ass....(unless of course i tour more colleges....fuck)
while i'm bftsob, what else is happenning in my fraction of a life? ooh, i scared some prospective students away the other day (with the help of joe yankus in a skirt) and my room is fucking freezing. untill then, when it does happen, ill let you know...
But this weekend is special. I have no classes saturday, i am not taking the evviiiill SATs again, and my afternoon program starts whnever i want it too. In other words: pARTAYYYYY!!!!
..well, actually no. We had this really funny SAT dinner (which is def the most ive laughed in a month, how sad is that...) i've been online for an hour, and in another 30 minutes my friend and i are watching Nip Tuck on DVD. I will probably be passed out after 2 episodes. I finally have a real weekend, and this is what i do with it...(i was considering getting ahead in my work, but that might be too shameful even for me) Seriously. What is school doing to my already barely- existant-by-a-thread life? I suppose i would have more to do if all my other friends were also not having class/not taking the SATS/ not going to a wedding, but still....Where's the highschool we've always wanted? How did I end up here again? WHERE ARE THE KEGS MAN??
oh well, im going home next weekend, this is def inspiration to make it kick ass....(unless of course i tour more colleges....fuck)
while i'm bftsob, what else is happenning in my fraction of a life? ooh, i scared some prospective students away the other day (with the help of joe yankus in a skirt) and my room is fucking freezing. untill then, when it does happen, ill let you know...
Thursday, October 05, 2006
The Elliptical is a LIE!!!!!!!!
Seriously....I've always figured there was a difference between the elliptical and
the treadmill, but this is absurd. If I can run 3 miles nonstop in a little under
half an hour on the elliptical, I'm in good shape, right? Apparently not. I did a
warm up mile on the elliptical (yes ladies and gentleman, Juicy does, infact,
exercise on occassion)and then went on the treadmill, only to find that after 2/3
of a mile at 6mph (which still only gets me a ten minute mile) I was out.
Furthermore, I can only cringe when I think of the time it once took me twelve
minutes to run a mile on the elliptical...
Anyway, this is my goal- by the time I graduate i will be able to do 3 consecutive
miles on the treadmill in just at or under half an hour (and also have a killer
stomach cuz apparently running on the treadmill works your abs too)
Ok that's really it for today....come visit me in the costumes shop!!!
oh ps- Mark Sutherland still needs to die, and I'm not terribly happy with vertical either....(which is like the understatement of the century)
the treadmill, but this is absurd. If I can run 3 miles nonstop in a little under
half an hour on the elliptical, I'm in good shape, right? Apparently not. I did a
warm up mile on the elliptical (yes ladies and gentleman, Juicy does, infact,
exercise on occassion)and then went on the treadmill, only to find that after 2/3
of a mile at 6mph (which still only gets me a ten minute mile) I was out.
Furthermore, I can only cringe when I think of the time it once took me twelve
minutes to run a mile on the elliptical...
Anyway, this is my goal- by the time I graduate i will be able to do 3 consecutive
miles on the treadmill in just at or under half an hour (and also have a killer
stomach cuz apparently running on the treadmill works your abs too)
Ok that's really it for today....come visit me in the costumes shop!!!
oh ps- Mark Sutherland still needs to die, and I'm not terribly happy with vertical either....(which is like the understatement of the century)
Sunday, October 01, 2006
Back In Orange...
I was bored and catching up with all my friends' blogs, so I decided to get back in the game. Heres whats been on my mind.
1. Maybe its just because i have more friends this year (being a senior, you meet alot of people in 3 years...) but i find myself being more and more of a gossip whore. Now, gossip is very interesting and funny and all, but sometimes it feels like we never talk about anything else. Obviously relationship drama is a quality aspect to life in highschool, but c'mon, we don't need to discuss it ad nauseum. there is more to life....right? You may hear me say something like "life is getting too small" what i mean to say is that my main area of focus has been reduced to such a tiny specturm (often to school, gossip/relationships, my friends, and in winter, hockey) and i feel i am becoming a less beneficial member of society by being so superficial. Obviously there's not much else going on in our young and meaningless (or at least very often, directionless) lives, but it would be nice to at least be able to hold an intelligent conversation about something else. (then again, if you have anything juicy, im still all ears...)
2. So everyone else seems really stressed out about this college thing and im well...not. i mean, i am concerned, and probably should schedule some interviews, but i just sortof have faith that i'll get in somewhere. My grades and extra curriculars are good, and i may not get into Harvard (my on and off top choice) but im still not heading to High Point University any time soon. (their brochure reads "complimentary beverages in between classes! new leather furniture in all the dorm rooms!" i kid you not...) On that note, with my list only consisting of 3 ivies and smith so far, i do really need to start looking at more safety/plausible schools, but i find myself really reluctant to take a college weekend, i can do this during winter break, right?
3. On the topic of stress, kiddies, here is the secret to school success: get lots of sleep and take lots of english classes. You would think my schedule would be harder than last year, i have double the number of APs plus a philosophy class and skipped a level in french. Is it? no, not at all. Maybe i am just used to working my ass off until 3am junior year (*shudder*) but with a whole 3 free blocks and teachers that could care less about actual deadlines (again, i stress the humanities...) this year so far has been amazing. last year i worked my ass off for a B+, and A-s were the rare product of hard, hard, work. This year i cant help but feel like im slacking off, but ive gotten two 95s in a row, plus a bunch of other As. infact, the only bad grades ive gotten were an 86 (horrible, i know) and a 77 (were working on that...) I am also getting 7 hours of sleep a night, something that could even be called 'breakfast' (portable coffee mugs=genius) and having a social life. maybe i just keep getting lucky (nexus powers) and sometimes i really feel i am pushing it, and that this bubble is going to burst and come back to bite me in the ass, but until then i am seriously not complaining...
though on that note, i probably should actually do my french HW, seeing as that 77 still needs a lift...later!
1. Maybe its just because i have more friends this year (being a senior, you meet alot of people in 3 years...) but i find myself being more and more of a gossip whore. Now, gossip is very interesting and funny and all, but sometimes it feels like we never talk about anything else. Obviously relationship drama is a quality aspect to life in highschool, but c'mon, we don't need to discuss it ad nauseum. there is more to life....right? You may hear me say something like "life is getting too small" what i mean to say is that my main area of focus has been reduced to such a tiny specturm (often to school, gossip/relationships, my friends, and in winter, hockey) and i feel i am becoming a less beneficial member of society by being so superficial. Obviously there's not much else going on in our young and meaningless (or at least very often, directionless) lives, but it would be nice to at least be able to hold an intelligent conversation about something else. (then again, if you have anything juicy, im still all ears...)
2. So everyone else seems really stressed out about this college thing and im well...not. i mean, i am concerned, and probably should schedule some interviews, but i just sortof have faith that i'll get in somewhere. My grades and extra curriculars are good, and i may not get into Harvard (my on and off top choice) but im still not heading to High Point University any time soon. (their brochure reads "complimentary beverages in between classes! new leather furniture in all the dorm rooms!" i kid you not...) On that note, with my list only consisting of 3 ivies and smith so far, i do really need to start looking at more safety/plausible schools, but i find myself really reluctant to take a college weekend, i can do this during winter break, right?
3. On the topic of stress, kiddies, here is the secret to school success: get lots of sleep and take lots of english classes. You would think my schedule would be harder than last year, i have double the number of APs plus a philosophy class and skipped a level in french. Is it? no, not at all. Maybe i am just used to working my ass off until 3am junior year (*shudder*) but with a whole 3 free blocks and teachers that could care less about actual deadlines (again, i stress the humanities...) this year so far has been amazing. last year i worked my ass off for a B+, and A-s were the rare product of hard, hard, work. This year i cant help but feel like im slacking off, but ive gotten two 95s in a row, plus a bunch of other As. infact, the only bad grades ive gotten were an 86 (horrible, i know) and a 77 (were working on that...) I am also getting 7 hours of sleep a night, something that could even be called 'breakfast' (portable coffee mugs=genius) and having a social life. maybe i just keep getting lucky (nexus powers) and sometimes i really feel i am pushing it, and that this bubble is going to burst and come back to bite me in the ass, but until then i am seriously not complaining...
though on that note, i probably should actually do my french HW, seeing as that 77 still needs a lift...later!
Sunday, August 27, 2006
A Day in the (not so juicy) Life of Juicy
So everyone else (aka all like five people whose blogs i read) is writing about their life, so i figured i might as well try and amuse you with mine. The key word in that sentance of course, is try.
Today was nice because it was raining. Maybe it seems odd to be on a dock in a new england during a mild storm, but it's actually really cool. i dont know if it's something about the surrounding fresh chaos, or the feeling of mysterious possibility (as if a sherlock holmes novel could begin to unfold around you at any minute) but it is, and has a kick ass sound track to boot. I spent the afternoon running errands with dad for his boat, going back to hang out on his boat, and reading my book for english next year on boat in middle of said rainstorm. It was chill.
When we came back to my house, my dad didnt want me to get sick ( i was sopping wet) so he instisted i have a rum shot, and kept saying "it's good for you! It's good for you" (ok dad, whatever...) I hate anything straight over 40%, (then again, the last hard liquor i had was green, maybe not such a good sign...) so i went to mix it but he insited I take it straight. We clinked, and he pretty much just laughed at me while my eyes started to well up. I was just recoverying the feeling in my esophagus when I got a hint of a slightly more pleasant after after taste and realized: I miss beer! Seriously, what the fuck is up with this country, stupid enforced liquor laws...it's disgusting. Vertical: that weekend is coming, and soon (even if i have to say i'm staying at elizas or something) Koopon and Klingon- when do you guys learn to drive?
Anyway, my grampa came over for dinner and i sat through the usual words of wisdom while my dad sang along to this random opera song he's obessed with (it was the same song last week) the homemade pasta was good. Then my dad started talking about how cool it would be if i got into Harvard or Brown, and how the double advantage being a woman there is all the great guys i would get to meet, and i might even marry a sucessfull buisness person! I totally called him out on this of course (and they wonder why im such a fem nazi at school...) and even my grandpa agreed with him. thats like, beyond a generation gap! But really, for starters, if it's a feminine advantage as opposed to a male one, then i guess im gay all of a sudden because it works both ways. Second of all, if i can't sleep over my guy friends houses now, how on earth can i be in prime condition to produce grandbabies by the time im in my 20s!
After dinner my grandpa gave me a ride back to my mom's house. I complimented her on the bow from the chocolate box that she tied in her hair, told her rum might make a great cure for her ulcer, and then went to my room to read more. I got bored with reading and too impatient to read on to the saucy bits, so i've been online ever since, sitting infront of the TV watching sitcoms sans cable, and there's really no one interesting online to talk to so I'm writing this (actually there almost was, but ill get to that later) it's 12:30, and i seriously need to finish that book so i can get up and write that essay tomorrow, but oh well.
Hold on, was that some thing juicy that was hinted at in the last parenthetical? well, sorta, not really. a friend of mine once told me i was a nexus of fate, so perhaps the unvierse is extra sensitive to my 'i'm sixteen and still single will someone please shoot me' cries. Day 1: old 'friend' (who has been trying to hang out with me since 7th grade) brings it up again, i finally block him after telling him that i wont hang out with him because i have this not so farfetched impression he's just been trying to get in my pants for years. His pre-block response? something like "why would i ever try for someone that i know is out of my league?" Ok dude, a word of advice before i go: no girl is that stupid, work on the BS lines. Day 2: So about a year ago, i turned down the opportunity to hook up with this really cute drunk guy on my last night in Paris, mainly because i'm a deaf idiot. Anyway, so I IMed him a little after the trip, nothing he seemed too interested in. But on Day 2, he IMs me totally out of the blue, stressing the 'we should hang out' and gives his cell. He lives in NY and was probably drunk (as always), but it's nice to know i've got a drinking buddy in the city who owes me some action ; ) Day 3: already buzzed on the last 2 days of pseudo lovin, i IM a cute guy i've known a bit after he rated me something on facebook. (i actually rated him something awhile ago, but oh well) I was being sorta odd (and made this one really bad joke) so i sorta let the convo die, but when it was good it was good, and at least there are other people in the world with whom i can randomly speak french.
OK so now it's 1 am and i'm cracking up over fraisier re runs, still not reading, and it's raining again. (just in case you started to think my life was actually getting interesting)
PS: if you derive nothing from this pretty pointless entry, know this: POETRY.COM IS A LIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Today was nice because it was raining. Maybe it seems odd to be on a dock in a new england during a mild storm, but it's actually really cool. i dont know if it's something about the surrounding fresh chaos, or the feeling of mysterious possibility (as if a sherlock holmes novel could begin to unfold around you at any minute) but it is, and has a kick ass sound track to boot. I spent the afternoon running errands with dad for his boat, going back to hang out on his boat, and reading my book for english next year on boat in middle of said rainstorm. It was chill.
When we came back to my house, my dad didnt want me to get sick ( i was sopping wet) so he instisted i have a rum shot, and kept saying "it's good for you! It's good for you" (ok dad, whatever...) I hate anything straight over 40%, (then again, the last hard liquor i had was green, maybe not such a good sign...) so i went to mix it but he insited I take it straight. We clinked, and he pretty much just laughed at me while my eyes started to well up. I was just recoverying the feeling in my esophagus when I got a hint of a slightly more pleasant after after taste and realized: I miss beer! Seriously, what the fuck is up with this country, stupid enforced liquor laws...it's disgusting. Vertical: that weekend is coming, and soon (even if i have to say i'm staying at elizas or something) Koopon and Klingon- when do you guys learn to drive?
Anyway, my grampa came over for dinner and i sat through the usual words of wisdom while my dad sang along to this random opera song he's obessed with (it was the same song last week) the homemade pasta was good. Then my dad started talking about how cool it would be if i got into Harvard or Brown, and how the double advantage being a woman there is all the great guys i would get to meet, and i might even marry a sucessfull buisness person! I totally called him out on this of course (and they wonder why im such a fem nazi at school...) and even my grandpa agreed with him. thats like, beyond a generation gap! But really, for starters, if it's a feminine advantage as opposed to a male one, then i guess im gay all of a sudden because it works both ways. Second of all, if i can't sleep over my guy friends houses now, how on earth can i be in prime condition to produce grandbabies by the time im in my 20s!
After dinner my grandpa gave me a ride back to my mom's house. I complimented her on the bow from the chocolate box that she tied in her hair, told her rum might make a great cure for her ulcer, and then went to my room to read more. I got bored with reading and too impatient to read on to the saucy bits, so i've been online ever since, sitting infront of the TV watching sitcoms sans cable, and there's really no one interesting online to talk to so I'm writing this (actually there almost was, but ill get to that later) it's 12:30, and i seriously need to finish that book so i can get up and write that essay tomorrow, but oh well.
Hold on, was that some thing juicy that was hinted at in the last parenthetical? well, sorta, not really. a friend of mine once told me i was a nexus of fate, so perhaps the unvierse is extra sensitive to my 'i'm sixteen and still single will someone please shoot me' cries. Day 1: old 'friend' (who has been trying to hang out with me since 7th grade) brings it up again, i finally block him after telling him that i wont hang out with him because i have this not so farfetched impression he's just been trying to get in my pants for years. His pre-block response? something like "why would i ever try for someone that i know is out of my league?" Ok dude, a word of advice before i go: no girl is that stupid, work on the BS lines. Day 2: So about a year ago, i turned down the opportunity to hook up with this really cute drunk guy on my last night in Paris, mainly because i'm a deaf idiot. Anyway, so I IMed him a little after the trip, nothing he seemed too interested in. But on Day 2, he IMs me totally out of the blue, stressing the 'we should hang out' and gives his cell. He lives in NY and was probably drunk (as always), but it's nice to know i've got a drinking buddy in the city who owes me some action ; ) Day 3: already buzzed on the last 2 days of pseudo lovin, i IM a cute guy i've known a bit after he rated me something on facebook. (i actually rated him something awhile ago, but oh well) I was being sorta odd (and made this one really bad joke) so i sorta let the convo die, but when it was good it was good, and at least there are other people in the world with whom i can randomly speak french.
OK so now it's 1 am and i'm cracking up over fraisier re runs, still not reading, and it's raining again. (just in case you started to think my life was actually getting interesting)
PS: if you derive nothing from this pretty pointless entry, know this: POETRY.COM IS A LIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Monday, August 21, 2006
Flavor of What???
Ok, what is it that everyone finds so enticing about Flavor Flav? He's short, skinny, looks dishevelled all the time, wears a VIKING hat (which by the way is so not ghetto), is sorta squinty, has a raspy voice, and overall looks like a bit of a junky. Now I feel bad for writing this, and I'm sure he's a very nice person and all, but in the real world 'nice' normally doesn't get you your own TV show where a variety of attractive women are all vying to be with you. *trys to fend off bad blogging karma*
Which brings me to another question: what is it that would encourage young women in this society to go on a show where they will all be vying for one man? it seems fun to a certain extent, but when you have all these girls saying "omigod he has to pick me! he has to pick me!" you start to see just a bit of an imbalance in power/respect. maybe this is just me being a fem nazi (though they do it for guys too and i don't think that's good either) but don't they realize that he probably means alot more to them then they do to him? (seeing as he has a choice between six and all...)
Remember back when The Bachelor(ette) was on? Right and left, you'd hear the contestants proclaiming their love for the prize and getting all emotional, without realizing it's all BS! I mean, they put you in a house, cut you off from the rest of the world, and make you contest for one prize with a bunch of other people in the exact same circumstance. Obviously, this is going to have the same psycological effect of placing a group of people together on an abandonned island: they're all going to go a little whacco. You're not actually in love, you stupid person, your emotions are just being amplified because at that time, the producers have made sure that that person and the contest is all you have to think about! How can you not realize that?!? Furthermore, what would entice someone to waste a whole television season's worth of their life trying to get together with a total stranger? Couldn't you at least go on the Trump show and get a decent job? or Project Runway (personal fav) and try and become a well-renouned fashion designer? Do you seriously have no other talent that is currently in demand by television audiences? (Chances are, you do. Pants Off Dance Off anyone?)
Which brings me to another question: what is it that would encourage young women in this society to go on a show where they will all be vying for one man? it seems fun to a certain extent, but when you have all these girls saying "omigod he has to pick me! he has to pick me!" you start to see just a bit of an imbalance in power/respect. maybe this is just me being a fem nazi (though they do it for guys too and i don't think that's good either) but don't they realize that he probably means alot more to them then they do to him? (seeing as he has a choice between six and all...)
Remember back when The Bachelor(ette) was on? Right and left, you'd hear the contestants proclaiming their love for the prize and getting all emotional, without realizing it's all BS! I mean, they put you in a house, cut you off from the rest of the world, and make you contest for one prize with a bunch of other people in the exact same circumstance. Obviously, this is going to have the same psycological effect of placing a group of people together on an abandonned island: they're all going to go a little whacco. You're not actually in love, you stupid person, your emotions are just being amplified because at that time, the producers have made sure that that person and the contest is all you have to think about! How can you not realize that?!? Furthermore, what would entice someone to waste a whole television season's worth of their life trying to get together with a total stranger? Couldn't you at least go on the Trump show and get a decent job? or Project Runway (personal fav) and try and become a well-renouned fashion designer? Do you seriously have no other talent that is currently in demand by television audiences? (Chances are, you do. Pants Off Dance Off anyone?)
Thursday, August 17, 2006
August is Such a Bullshit Month
...I mean seriously, when was the last time something exciting ever happenned in August. Everyone goes abroad or to camp in july, then comes back in August and either goes on some random family vacation, does all the reading/summer work they put off during july, melts by the pool, or finds some other way to essentially do nothing. Time itself seems to be getting lazy- when was the last time you automatically knew what the date was in August? There's no denying the lingering sense of boredom that seeps into the million small moments that comprise this month. And it's effects are clear: with little else to think about, people seem constantly caught up in their own neurosis. When this is not the case, the lack of activity causes people to make stupid decisions (piercings, beards, the list goes on...) and follow completely random and nonsensical trains of thought. (like about skittles) Come to think of it, the effects of the month of August are very similar to those of drugs. True, if it weren't for the fantastic dullness that is August people would not even mildly look forward to going back to school, nor would they have anything to romanticize about after the windy rush of September has come, but until then, August sucks.
Friday, August 11, 2006
Red White and Bull Shit: Exactly How Dependable Is Democracy?
If there's one thing everyone seems to be able to agree on in America, it's that we all have the right to disagree. We have turned that train of thought into a system we prize very much, also known as democracy. Democracy of course has multiple advantages, but sometimes I can't help but see some fallbacks to the utillitarian, 'power to the people' philosophy, especially with the current elections in place. Just because people vote for a canidate, are they really voting for what they want or need?
If you read my last blog entry/quote, it's frightening to think that some people would support a variety of issues that they have no idea about, simply because a canidate claims to support Christian values. True, he is against abortion, gay marriage, and a large amount of stem cell research, but what about the billions of other things he's affected? One issue voting is a pretty dangerous way to go if you're not looking at the whole picture. And finally, what the hell does religion have to do with politics in general? Aren't we supposed to be glad we at least try to put up the illusion of seperating the two, having viewed the atrocities of middle eastern theocracies? Everyone has a right to their own beliefs, and if you want to believe that the gay couple next door to you are going to burn in hell for their sins, that's fine. But leave the punishing up to God, not the government. (And if you do think the government is more necessary than God to do that, then I ask you to reasses your personal faith to begin with.)
A lot of people are also far too easily swayed by charisma. Just because a canidate has good social skills, it does not mean he has good leadership skills. Wasn't it President Johnson whose poor social skills actually made him work even harder for people while he was in the oval office just to gain their support? That's the kind of thing that should sway a person's vote, not a sturdy handshake or a kiss on your baby's forhead. In fact, alot of the campaigning that happens, especially for the presidency, is frankly total BS. It's pure marketing. Whether it's republicans trying to appeal to family values and small home town America, or democrats just insulting the hell out of the Bush presidency at any excuse, neither of these are particularly informative to me when the polls open up. Why can't they just skip all the PR bullshit and give me a list of what each canidate is standing for and what (s)he's not, what (s)he plans to do about current and possible future problems, and maybe even have and independant organization do some research for me. How did (s)he do in lower politics? what is the ratio of things (s)he said (s)he would do compared to the things (s)he actually did? etc. etc. I know it sounds oversimplfied, but I would much rather have a straightforward packet of information from an unbiased organization than have to listen to speeches that try and speak to our emotional side instead of our sensible one. True, we've got the debates, and I don't know how many voters tune in for them, but I have a feeling it's miniscule compared to the hoards of people at political campaign events. And didn't Kennedy even manage to turn the debates into a PR event? Finally, if you're going to advertise yourself, please do advertise yourself. One of my major pet peeves is when politicians devote entire add campaigns to spilling dirt on their opponents. Seriously, do you have anything better to say? At least try to balance it out a little.
Then of course, there are the people who join a party and stick to it. It doesn't matter who they're voting for, so long as their party is in power. I also think this is not such a good idea. Do you know why some sort of two part system has lasted in this country almost since it was founded? that's because, and obviously no devoted party member will admit it, but neither ideology is perfect for every situation. It's a known fact that when the economy is going well, people want freer markets and fewer trade barriers, while in times of economic trouble people will sacrafice more capitalistic freedoms for food on the table. It doesn't make sense to vote for the same party at every election, simply because the changing times make some idealogies better for the current situation than others. (This doesn't hold true in all cases, but it can be said about many of them)
So what should we do about this? Sadly, there's not much. I think it would be great if we could create an organization to compile and distribute completely unbiased information about canidates to every registered voter, (which would probably cause an onset of slander lawsuits and bribing, not to mention be very costly) and maybe give every voter a class in how to handle and analyze this information to what really suits their needs, (again, mucho opportunities for subjectivity and a huge cost to tax payers) then we would see a more intelligent voter turn out. This way, canidates could cut the crap and be forced to get to the point. I know this program sounds really idealistic, but something has to be done.
American people live in a country that empowers them more than many other countries worldwide, and in exchange for this great power comes the responsibility to use it wisely by voting intelligently. Just think of how much happier everyone could be if they invested a little more thought and effort into the future of their country or state! Think of the higher standards government would be held to, and the better integrity of its people and policies! It's pathetic that a large percentage of Americans don't even care enough to vote to begin with, but of those who do, so many are easily swayed for the wrong reason. Only the people can stop this, and if it continues, only the people will suffer.
If you read my last blog entry/quote, it's frightening to think that some people would support a variety of issues that they have no idea about, simply because a canidate claims to support Christian values. True, he is against abortion, gay marriage, and a large amount of stem cell research, but what about the billions of other things he's affected? One issue voting is a pretty dangerous way to go if you're not looking at the whole picture. And finally, what the hell does religion have to do with politics in general? Aren't we supposed to be glad we at least try to put up the illusion of seperating the two, having viewed the atrocities of middle eastern theocracies? Everyone has a right to their own beliefs, and if you want to believe that the gay couple next door to you are going to burn in hell for their sins, that's fine. But leave the punishing up to God, not the government. (And if you do think the government is more necessary than God to do that, then I ask you to reasses your personal faith to begin with.)
A lot of people are also far too easily swayed by charisma. Just because a canidate has good social skills, it does not mean he has good leadership skills. Wasn't it President Johnson whose poor social skills actually made him work even harder for people while he was in the oval office just to gain their support? That's the kind of thing that should sway a person's vote, not a sturdy handshake or a kiss on your baby's forhead. In fact, alot of the campaigning that happens, especially for the presidency, is frankly total BS. It's pure marketing. Whether it's republicans trying to appeal to family values and small home town America, or democrats just insulting the hell out of the Bush presidency at any excuse, neither of these are particularly informative to me when the polls open up. Why can't they just skip all the PR bullshit and give me a list of what each canidate is standing for and what (s)he's not, what (s)he plans to do about current and possible future problems, and maybe even have and independant organization do some research for me. How did (s)he do in lower politics? what is the ratio of things (s)he said (s)he would do compared to the things (s)he actually did? etc. etc. I know it sounds oversimplfied, but I would much rather have a straightforward packet of information from an unbiased organization than have to listen to speeches that try and speak to our emotional side instead of our sensible one. True, we've got the debates, and I don't know how many voters tune in for them, but I have a feeling it's miniscule compared to the hoards of people at political campaign events. And didn't Kennedy even manage to turn the debates into a PR event? Finally, if you're going to advertise yourself, please do advertise yourself. One of my major pet peeves is when politicians devote entire add campaigns to spilling dirt on their opponents. Seriously, do you have anything better to say? At least try to balance it out a little.
Then of course, there are the people who join a party and stick to it. It doesn't matter who they're voting for, so long as their party is in power. I also think this is not such a good idea. Do you know why some sort of two part system has lasted in this country almost since it was founded? that's because, and obviously no devoted party member will admit it, but neither ideology is perfect for every situation. It's a known fact that when the economy is going well, people want freer markets and fewer trade barriers, while in times of economic trouble people will sacrafice more capitalistic freedoms for food on the table. It doesn't make sense to vote for the same party at every election, simply because the changing times make some idealogies better for the current situation than others. (This doesn't hold true in all cases, but it can be said about many of them)
So what should we do about this? Sadly, there's not much. I think it would be great if we could create an organization to compile and distribute completely unbiased information about canidates to every registered voter, (which would probably cause an onset of slander lawsuits and bribing, not to mention be very costly) and maybe give every voter a class in how to handle and analyze this information to what really suits their needs, (again, mucho opportunities for subjectivity and a huge cost to tax payers) then we would see a more intelligent voter turn out. This way, canidates could cut the crap and be forced to get to the point. I know this program sounds really idealistic, but something has to be done.
American people live in a country that empowers them more than many other countries worldwide, and in exchange for this great power comes the responsibility to use it wisely by voting intelligently. Just think of how much happier everyone could be if they invested a little more thought and effort into the future of their country or state! Think of the higher standards government would be held to, and the better integrity of its people and policies! It's pathetic that a large percentage of Americans don't even care enough to vote to begin with, but of those who do, so many are easily swayed for the wrong reason. Only the people can stop this, and if it continues, only the people will suffer.
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