Emo Blogging

If you don’t expect anything you’ll never be disappointed. It’s a proven fact, and it’s pretty much how I live my life. You’d think it would be the least emotionally dangerous way to go about things, seeing as you never get fucked over. but what they don’t tell you is that after years and years of not expecting anything, you may not get hurt by other people, but you end up hurting yourself even more, and it’s the kind of hurt that no one else can deliver quite as poignantly as you can. It’s not the crippling, painful blow that comes all at once when someone turns you down, but a creeping soreness that you don’t even realize is a pain until it’s disturbed. And once it is, there’s no going back.
When someone else tells you youre not good enough, you can always tell them they’re wrong or just run away from them. It sucks to have someone else disappoint you like that, which is why so many people (like myself) will go to crazy lengths to avoid just that situation. But really which is worse? Having someone else fuck you over and getting over it, or giving yourself just that tiny little pinch of “ just don’t bother” everyday until that part of you is so numb you don’t even realize you’re touching it. And when it does get jabbed a little harder than usual, it bleeds like hell until you can grow and even thicker scab, whose dried and flaky carnage slowly replaces the space that used to be saved for nerve endings.
Hello, my name is Juicy and my soul consists of a large clump of dried cells that don’t even have nuclei. Whatever you do, don’t turn out like me.