Monday, February 12, 2007

You Knew It Was Coming...

Well I don't feel like doing my CompGov reading just yet, (if I ever do) so I'm going to take a second to rant about the upcoming "holiday" AKA a catholic saint's feast blown entirely out of proportion because we are a society of dreamy-eyed pussies who gobble up romantic comedies like no other (myself not entirely excluded- still haven't decided which one I'll be bawling my eyes out to come wednesday).

Honestly, I can never decide whether I like Valentine's day or not. On one hand, I get to wear my favorite colors (even if i look like a total tool because I dont actually have a valentine) and eat a lot of chocolate and feel loved by all my friends that send me valentines. (key word in that sentance being 'friends') On the other hand, it disturbs me how Hallmark has taken the most complex and f-ing fickle human emotion (cuz thats really all romantic love is and all that Valentine's day intends to celebrate), something that people have spent thousands of years living and trying to figure out, something that people have even died for, and reduced it to a tacky red heart with a doilie behind it. Seriously. And as if human relationships were that simple. It makes sense to celebrate romantic love and all, but do we have to be so goddam tacky about it? When I think of Valentines day I think of cheap serrated to/from cards (the kind they gave out in grade school and that I only got because you had to be nice and give them to everyone) and tacky one-liners like "will you be my valentine?" Yuck. who wants to be a valentine? It's phrases like that that almost make me glad i'm alone. And even if someone were to ask me out, i'd almost be embarassed to say he did it on Valentine's day just because it's so cliche and superficial sounding.


Let's also not forget that Valentine's day inevitibly makes at LEAST fifty percent of the population miserable. If you are alone, it gets rubbed in even further. If you are alone but someone asks you out, the relationship is in all liklihood doomed because the guy/girl had to wait for some stupid holiday to do anything about it, not to mention probably reduced themself to generic gift giving in lieu of anything really meaningful or thoughtful. (flowers and chocolate: sweet motion, yes, sometimes tasty, but that's pretty much it.) Now let's look at the people who are actually in relationships: half of them will relish the opportunity to show how much they love each other, while the other half will feel awkward because they have no idea what to do, or because one person got really into it and the other didn't. (so now at least 12.5 percent of the population feel like horrible people, and the other 12.5 percent feel like fools. Awesome!)

Now that I've vented my excessive bitterness, I can go on to appreciate what little joy I get from the holiday, i.e. free candy, nice colors, and presents from my friends. (cuz I really do appreciate those, seeing as i'm careful to never actually expect anything to begin with, for those of you that missed my lovely "emo blog" which i would actually link you to but that takes way too much effort) Plus there's always the joy of living vicariously through others and hearing about all the cute shit that happenned to them. As for me, I took a bite of my first piece of Valentine's Day chocolate the other day and I cut my gum...I think we can take that as an omen...

Friday, February 02, 2007

24 HOURS BITCHES!!!!!

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I, Juicy, and Polly, My Indian Sex Kitty (well technically just me but whatever) has broken 24 hours of consecutive conciousness for the first time EVERRR!! How did she do it you ask? Well it all started with these Blue Demon Full Throttles, chosen partially because they were tequila flavored (I think) which are pretty much the sickest things ever (yes, better than Amp)because they taste amazing (good amazing, not like nasty oversweet energy drink so just bear it amazing)and will pretty much have you walking around your neighborhood yelling random things and running around in the snow (!) at six o clock in the morning. Well, at least it will give you the energy to....the psycho bit is probably just me. Though I swear to god that tree looked like a creepy guy.....hey now I've only gotten 13 hours of sleep in the past five days...dammit i need to be awake by 12....Oh, I should also probably add in that we split a red bull and had a sugarload of sour patch kids cotton candy, which is nasty at first but gets sort of "morish" on you (as my mom said before she started spanking me and making S&M jokes...really, she did) And the four American Pie movies really helped too...funny how if i were doing work id've been dead 4 hours ago...ok ISK is getting tired and I should probably sleep, though this whole psycho conciousness thing is really fun.

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Starbucks=Life

So I would be on my 3rd energy drink/ 5th (?) caffeneited beverage in 24 hours (the much feared 'full throttle', it was all blockbuster had, probably has something to do with it being owned by coke...monopolistic nazis)and watching every single American Pie film ever made (except American Wedding cuz blockbuster is annoying like that) except that my Indian Sex Kitty actually fell asleep during our "ten minute nap" almost two hours ago, so here I am blogging for both your and my entertainment. wheeeee!!
So I was working in Starbucks the other day (because that's pretty much all I do now, and yet I still manage to hand everything in late because I am a failure and a lazy ass with no time management skills who just won't learn to stop pushing it to the last minute and who has severly fucked herself over for like the third time and who is absolutley sick of always cramming shit at the last minute. Who would have thought that one three hour nap monday afternoon would fuck me over for the rest of the week? That said, I should probably be working on the rewrites that have been hanging over my head for like a week, But like I said, i've been doing nothing but papers since saturday night and there is simply no paper writing function left in me. the 13 hours of sleep over three days really helped too. Wow that was a long parenthetical rant.) ANYWAY I was being studious in starbucks and I looked up and saw a kid, couldn't have been older than 10, doing her Wordly Wise homework on the table next to me. I looked to the other side and saw a mom with two kids, maybe 8 and 5, looking equally productive. What has become of society?!? OK, Highschool and college students I get, but elementary school kids are now joining the regular starbucks workforce too? That is just wrong...
It's funny though, how starbucks turns into a noisy, brand-name beverage selling library on Sunday nights....go down and see for yourself sometime. It's all highschool students in little groups with their drinks and books. I really have to wonder how i ever got work done before this place popped up...pshh, the library...

Yeah so im pretty much the biggest dork on the face of the planet and it's getting worse and worse as time progresses. Or maybe I'm not because....