Well, it seems Juicy has come a a long way from her double hitter weekend. Not too far in the long run, but far enough to keep her summer interesting, and to pass on some tidbits of juicy advice to all you Mango Addicts out there. (Or just those of you with nothing better to do on the internet...)
1. How to spot a manwhore:
A. all of his facebook action is from girls
B. ok, that's all i've got for now, but it does the trick.
2. When a guy is drunk he will be slightly more prone to sexual activity. This fact will be verbally expressed many, many, many times.
3. If a guy gets so drunk he makes a complete fool of himself over your hotness, there is the slight possibility he will not call back once his friends tell him everything they will never let him live down.
4. A TRUE man will have the balls to call back anyway. Bitch.
5. When a guy doesn't call you back for 1-2 weeks but then does when there is an approaching social event involving the both of you, he is doing this in order to make things not be awkward and leave a good impression. This is all in the hopes of ass getting.
6. How to spot a manwhore who does not call you back: See section 1, then factor in a sentance involving the words "sorry" "forgot" "call" and "you." Bitch.
7. Phone tag can be very satisfying. One has the joy of being called back, but without the stress that comes from talking on the phone with people you want to impress. However, if this safety device is abused, interest will eventually fade. (unless he really, really likes you. see #10 for more info)
8. When a guy tells you about all the bad luck he's had with women and how he is often taken advantage of because he is a nice guy, this is actually a cleverly disguised ass getting tactic known as "playing the sensitive card."
9.If a guy calls you 1-3 times a day, everyday, and sometimes more often when you don't pick up (AKA more frequently than your own father) he either A.) really, really likes you; B.) has an obsessive personality; or, C.) is really really bored. Only time will tell.
10. If a guy with whom you have been slightly flirtatious hooks up with "a really hot 25 year old" within 24 hours of hearing you hooked up with someone else, he has a motive... we're not exactly sure what it is yet, but it's there...we think...
11. When you give a guy your number out of the blue, even with merely friendly intentions, he will try to use this to get him ass.
12. If a guy with whom you have not spoken in years calls you at 2am and blatanly propositions you....No, I think you all can figure that one out for yourselves. I Hope.
So that's pretty much my summer in a nutshell. Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. ; )
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