To Whom It May Concern,
As we all know, a decent percentage of our prime-time TV commercial slots are filled with adds for Sonic: A mysterious food chain, which, according to recently discovered shocking evidence ladies and gentlemen, might actually exist. It was a grueling search indeed (taking several groups of google keywords) and apparently we are not the only ones who often wonder "Where the hell is that place?" but we now, in fact, have an excellent reason to believe that a (supposedly) mediocre meal and drinks with creatively-crafted flavor shot combinations served to us retrostyle on rollerskates might just be that much closer.
And by that much closer, according to the newfound evidence, I mean approximatly three hours (four from the northern end of the state). It will be a quest indeed, but I have vowed that by the end of this year (or maybe even, with God's will, this summer) I will go to a Sonic and prove once and for all that their existance is not fiction, but fact. I know it will be a dangerous challenge, but the time has come to weed out the weaklings if that is the sacrafice required to once and for all turn theory to law. Be assured, a discovery of this calibur's implications will ricochet across all fields and far into the future for generations to come. In the name of Science, Men, who's with me?
A professional artist's interpretation of the mysterious food chain:
All parties interested, please contact me via the 'comments' link below.
Sincerely yours,
Dr. Juicy, PhD.
4 comments:
i'm in. I fucking love sonic. there are none above the south new jersey border though.
Exactly, it will be an arduous mission comrade. I commend your enthusiasm, and shall reward you with being the chief of navigation (and therefore, get shotgun)
I like me some Sonic, but it's not worth driving three or four hours to get it, unless the trip involves some other wholesome activity (whatever that may be). Yes, the cherry limeade is yummy in my tummy, but it's not THAT yummy. And besides, the other menu items are on a par with any other fast food.
C'mon gavrich, it's not about the food, it is about making an advance in the name of science!
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